One More Thing

Chapter Twenty One: What A Mess

"What did you find out?" I ask, my heart fluttering in my chest.

Jude bites his lower lip as if he is trying to reign in the words from spilling out of his mouth.

"You can tell me," I say.

"I don't think I can," he whispers, his eyes as round as saucers. He looks scared.

Lost.

"Is it something really bad?"

"Valerie," he sighs, a trace of irritation in his voice. "Trust me. You're better off not knowing."

Great. Well, that just makes me want to know even more.

"Is it something to do with me?"

"For god's sake," he snaps.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You think the whole world revolves around you, don't you?" He stands up and looks at me, his eyes glowing with anger. "This is one of the worst days of my life and all you can think about is how it affects you. Do you have any idea how selfish that is?"

"I'm sorry," I walk after him, quickening my pace to keep up with his long strides.

He doesn't answer but carries on walking, eyes focused ahead. We pass through the park gates and I throw myself in front of him so that he has to stop.

"I mean it," I say. "I'm sorry. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, okay? You're going through a rough time and I should have put your feelings above mine, but I didn't, so if you hate me, I can't blame you."

"I don't hate you," he mutters. "I just want to be left alone."

"Okay," I say, my voice shaking from nervousness.

He starts walking again and I move out the way.

I can't bring myself to move. I just stand there, glued to the spot as he walks away, self-hatred eating my heart away.

Why was I so stupid?