Solitude -> The Walking Dead

63

"We still have knives. That's all we'll need against them." Carol remarked.

The weight of the kitchen knife I had stored under my shirt weighed me down. It felt different without a holster, made me more aware that it was a weapon and not an accessory.

"Well, tonight at the meeting? If it looks like it's going bad, I whistle. Josephine grabs Deanna, I take Spencer, Michonne grabs Reg. Glenn, Carol and Abraham cover us, watch the crowd." Rick explained.

To be fair, Deanna has been getting on my nerves. Threatening her would be oddly therapeutic. I wouldn't have to pretend as if her speeches about civilization didn't want to make me fall asleep.

"We can talk to them." Glenn protested.

I bit my lip thinking of whether they'd actually listen. It's not like this is the first time Rick has brought up things he finds wrong with this community to Deanna.

Maybe if he had been more direct, it would've changed things but I find that difficult to believe. Deanna firmly believes in her version of the world.

"Yeah, we will. If we can't get through, we take the three of them and say we'll slit their throats." Rick said.

Glenn's eyes narrowed. "Like at Terminus?"

A shudder went over me as I remembered that place. I still remember the word scribbled onto the walls. Never again. Those are the ones that stood out to me.

"No, we just tell 'em. They give us the armory and it's over." Rick said.

He didn't say what happens to them after we get the armory. They won't just go peacefully. Whether we kill them in the beginning or the end, it doesn't really matter. Either way, we return back to who we were before this place.

"Did you want this?" Glenn asked.

I glanced at Rick out of the corner of my eye. He frowned at the idea of doing this on purpose. It was a possibility. He could've planned it to force Deanna to wake up.

"No. I hit my limit. I... I screwed up. And here we are." Rick admitted.

His face had been turned towards me when he said he had screwed up. It wasn't an apology, he better be aware of that.

I have done a lot of things wrong in my life, but I have never lied to our group. Sometimes they've probably wished that I did. Yet I stayed honest.

I took a deep breath before exiting the room. There was a faint call of my name but I couldn't deal with Rick right now. Deanna would let him out soon so he can join the meeting tonight.

He'll find me. I know he will. But until then, I had time to think.

Footsteps could be heard behind me until Carol started walking alongside me. I slowed down a bit so our steps would even.

"Don't shut him out for this. He did the right thing and you know it." She retorted.

A humorless chuckle left my lips. "You're in on it, aren't you?"

She grabbed my elbow making me stop walking. I turned to face her with a clenched jaw. She doesn't have to say it out loud for me to know it's true. Rick and her did this together.

"Do you honestly trust these people?" She argued.

The only single person that has felt trustworthy here has been Aaron. Without him, the place felt deceptively nice. Like it could snap at you when you least expect it.

"Of course not, but this is crossing a line that cannot be undone. And you're putting every single member of our group in danger." I snapped.

Conspiring behind our backs has done more damage than good. They're thinking of kicking Rick out. Our leader, for fuck's sake.