Forgotten Lands | LVA [Anthology]

For the little Bonin (Internecion Cube)

For thousands of years, mankind has believed in gods, in deities, in beings beyond our ability to think. We try our best to get closer to them, to touch divinity is an impossible task, but since when has that ever stopped us from trying? Credulity blinds any man sometime, because feeling superior is a blessing and a curse, we no longer want to go with god, we want to be him.

I don't know enough words to express all my remorse, because today, my daughter, I want to ask for your forgiveness. Forgive me for breaking the promise I made to your mother the day you were born, it was foolish to believe that it would be another day and that burns me inside. Forgive me for not being the best father of all, I do not deserve that praise anymore, for I have been worse than a monster, worse than a beast and that has brought nothing but misfortune.

Nostalgia still hits my face every morning, framed next to my bed, punishing my eyes with cloudy days and nights of endless storm. As beautiful you were as your mother, your soft skin, your sweet smile, your shining silver hair that highlighted your ruby eyes. Immortalized on paper and in my heart, condemning me for the greatest sin a man can commit.

We try to be gods and fail miserably. We do not create life, we take it away. We do not create a better future, we destroy it. We do not save the world, we condemn it. We took the lives of our children and turned them into weapons, weapons that would ensure a bright future for all mankind, but now these weapons have begun to disobey, and the world... the world was already doomed from the beginning.

I was offered the chance to have you back, but I turned it down, you don't deserve a punishment like this, to see you turned into something like this would destroy my soul, even more than it already is.

Now I drown my sorrows in alcohol, waiting for the day when death itself knocks at my door to take me away, I will follow it without complaining, I already know what my destiny will be, the flames of hell will not appease even a little the immense pain I feel when I see your picture.

My little girl, this letter is for you. If there is indeed a benevolent god, I know that you and mommy will receive the love and care that I can never give you.

I am truly sorry, dad will love you forever.