X AND Y (Sunghoon & Wonyoung)

Chapter 25: Mistaken

"I missed you. Ani- I am missing you... Even now"

I was about to ask him something, regarding what he said. But then, before I could even do so, he spoke again.

"That's what Yeji also wanted me to tell you for her" he suddenly said, looking away and just proceeded to go to my kitchen. For some reason, my heart sank after hearing what he just said. So it was Yeji.

Ah... Right... What am I even putting up my hopes for?

At this moment, I just felt stupid by just even thinking about the idea that he may still have feelings for me. I do not know why though but when he said that, it felt as if he was really saying that to me personally.

'A-ani, I shouldn't overthink it. How would that even be possible? how stupid of me...'

"So why are you still here? I thought you are just here to deliver the notes?" I asked coldly, losing all of my interest.

"..."

For a moment, I received no response from him. He just continued to prepare something in the kitchen. So I just decided to speak again.

"You already have given me the notes. Don't you think you should go already?"

"Yeji asked me to. To look after you before leaving" he responded indifferently. And once again, I got disappointed. I already expected that it will not be a personal reason.

But it still hurts hearing it from him directly. Not because I still do like him. But because it really did seem all of what happened between us before, really did end up in rubbles. The thing that is most frustrating though, is because it was my fault in the first place. I hated the fact he did not hear me out. But who am I to blame him when the cause was me. It was not something I could have explained properly that time anyway. I am in no place at all to hate him. And yet... I keep on acting like this to him.

'why has this become so complicated...? I wonder... What does Sunghoon really think and feel...'

A part of me really do want to ask him that. But I know I couldn't.

"Here" he said handing me over a bowl of vegetable soup and my favorite dish, tonkatsu. He even prepared some side dishes and a fruit juice I have always liked. I am embarrassed to say this but it made my woke my appetite up. Sunghoon has always been good at cooking since he was young. He would even sometimes tell me not to bring my lunch as he will be bringing something he has personally made.

"Those are your favorites right? I also prepared all the other ingredients and recipe you can use. Stop eating those cup noodles. You know it is bad for you" he reminded.

"Stop acting like you know me all that well, will you?" I firmly requested. He has been like this ever since we first met. He kept on talking about the past, and only about it. Bringing up the me of before. It is getting annoying... He never once asked how I was doing all these years.

"How could I? when I truly know you were not just someone to me" He responded. Somehow, it left me speechless as he does have a point. Even I can't properly treat him as a stranger.

"About Karina... It was never my intention. It just happened so that she suddenly decided to visit me at school despite me telling to never show up infront of me-" he seemed to noticed my complexion getting a bit bad so he tried to explain. But I cut him off.

"You do not have to explain. It is not like I care"

"...okay. I have done everything I have to already. So I will take my leave now" he said as he stood up.

"..." I just sat there not saying any other words. What else should I even tell him anyway? All I want is for him to immediately leave. But before he headed out, he stopped mid way and spoke.

"Wonyoung-a... I am really sorry for what happened. I'll make sure it doesn't happen again"

Sometimes he acts like he cares. Sometimes he acts like he doesn't. I just do not understand him... What is it really?

After saying what he just said, he already left. I did not even bid a proper goodbye to him. I just watched him walk away. But, I don't know why. Somehow, his words made me feel reassured.

Why am I feeling this way...?

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Sunghoon's POV

After I got in the car I just flopped and sighed heavily. I couldn't help but put my palm again in my head.

"How was it, young master?" My buttler asked.

"I felt like a coward..." I replied.

"Youth can be very complicated huh..." He commented as he started driving.

"Please send someone to watch over Karina's whereabouts. And inform me immediately if she sets foot again in this city" I politely ordered.

"Understood"

To be completely honest, I also do not know for sure why I suddenly said that. when I said I missed her, I did mean it but I suddenly Twitter my words. As to why... If I were to be asked how I really feel about her now... I still do not know clearly. I do hate her for that incident. After all, I hate it most when someone lies. And that kind of lie, even more. But for some reason, I can not completely hate her fully as well.

When she suddenly disappeared with out any words, I strangely felt empty. Although it was me who did say that I did not want to see her ever again out of anger... I was unconsciously longing for her. Wondering where could she be at. My hate grew even further during those times. Since I can't seem to get over her, which was getting frustrating to me.

But when I suddenly saw her again... I felt happy. Seeing her again after quite a long time. Seeing her doing fine. With that as well though, I feel a bit angry seeing her doing fine even without me all those times.

So I said and did quite a few mean things to her when we met. Especially when I knew someone had their eyes on her. But because of that, I started realizing that I still do have lingering feelings for her.

Maybe because a part of me still wants to believe that everything that happened back then has happened for a valid reason. But the true reason... I have no knowledge whatsoever about it. I was not open to hear any explanation at first. But when I tried to, she did not tell me. Or more specifically, she couldn't and just disappeared. Maybe I wanted to hear the truth from Wonyoung, this time.

I am quite mad of myself that I did not hear her out immediately that time. And only did try when everything was already too late. I guess you could say I have lots of regrets.

But if I were to tell her my honest feelings... Will it guarantee us back together? I am not even sure as well if she still sees me the way she did back then. Or if she really did.

Wonyoung-a... Just what happened back then that I did not know...?

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"If I reveal even more... How do you think will Sunghoon react, Wonyoung-a? Not just him... But everyone in the school"

"J..just tell me immediately what you want"

"Hmm, I think you do know what I want. It is simple... You... Disappear. And never show up in front of us ever again. You are just a fake anyway. Everything about you... Is all a lie"