Hadiya
I don't believe that I am a strong woman even though Abbas won't stop thinking that. I think I'm just a woman. a woman who was put into situations she didn't believe she can handle. I thought I would never make it this far. I look back now and I realize I have. I was capable of so much more than I thought or could ever think. I just wish I had worried less about whether I will make it through everything. I wish I had cherished my moments more. I simply died in time, I could have done everything I did and enjoyed it. I feel like I hardly gave Jabil the childhood that I could have given him. my jobs were exhausting and hurt my back for sure but I learned how to do khidab. I love khidab and I even got to do it on Marwa's hands before her wedding day.
Abbas rolls over in his sleep almost falling off the bed. I grab his arm although he's too heavy I try to drag him back onto the bed. "don't worry I'm awake" he mumbles
"go to sleep then"
"I can't my mind won't sleep since you're awake" I brush his hair, he spent the whole day yesterday trying to convince me that the horse bullhead Jabil talks about was my horse, Kassi. I didn't believe him because the way Jabil described it made it seem like a mad horse. he was right though it was my horse.
abbas challenged the owner of the stables because he wouldn't sell it to us. I told him I forgot how to ride it but he insisted. now I have my horse again and he's knocked out from the fight. His injuries haven't even fully healed yet.
Abbas
I run after Hadiya when I hear her vomit in the bathroom. I knock repeatedly and she doesn't answer. I'm scared, what if she's dying? I knock down the door and I find her huddled over the toilet with her hair in the way. She puts her hand up gesturing for me to stop looking. I slip my hand beneath her hair and hold it away from her face. I tap gently on her back but I'm trying to conceal my joy. I remember my mother vomiting before she had my little sister. I shouldn't jump to conclusions but It feels impossible to contain my smile.
Hadiya stands up cleaning her face. Marwa runs to us and starts running around in panic. She clearly doesn't know what this means. "Is she alright? What's wrong with aunt Hadiya?"
I laugh at the girl's foolishness, but It warms my heart to see her in a panic because she cares. I'm glad Jabil married the right girl.
"Calm down kid it's alright" she looks unsure whether she should calm down or not but stops running around.
"No I'm going to be a father," I said looking at Hadiya who stepped on my foot nervously to shush me.
"We don't actually know that yet"
"Insha'Allah it's true," Marwa says
Hadiya is worried but I lift her by surprise and spin her. "My Hadiya Insha'Allah it's true"
"Insha'Allah," she said nervously and I don't want her to be nervous about this
"If it's no that's okay too" I reassured her so she doesn't feel any pressure.
"I just don't want to get my hopes up for nothing"
"As long as your okay habibti, it's alright"
It was alright. I do want a baby but I don't want her to feel like there's pressure. In the end, we can only hope that Allah handles all these other matters out of our control.
I waited a few days but Hadiya insisted on a few weeks. I have a feeling that she really is pregnant though. I wore a red shirt and she wouldn't stop looking at it with disgust. She ran around the house trying to ignore me. Like always I chased her around to see what was the matter.
"I'm sorry, it's your shirt" she gags and tries to conceal it with her hand. I changed my shirt right away and then she stopped ignoring me. As long as she didn't hate me, that would have been a little difficult to recover from. Pregnancy is so strange. After going to the doctor and making sure she is pregnant I walked with her to our place near the River swinging our hands back and forth from joy.
she rests her head on my shoulder. "I'm pregnant abbas, I really am pregnant"
I kiss the top of her head. I'm going to be a dad. I can't wait to chase my kid around the house and look at their tiny fingers and feet. ya, Allah, you have given me everything and I hope that you turn my matters into a way that will never make me forget all the good you have bestowed upon me.
Hadiya looks up at me and I pull her closer to my side "you really are my Hadiya"(my gift- in this case, he's talking about the meaning of her name)
"And you're mine"
i finally finished the book. thanks to a special someone who kept texting me to continue writing. also, I'm going to go back into the story and do a lot and I mean A LOT of heavy editing. thank you so much for actually reading this story. this was my first book, so there are still a lot of things I'm still working on and trying to make my writing better for future books. please give me any feedback on what could have been done better, and if you felt like some parts were being dragged on for too long. (sorry about that by the way hehe, still working on how to not drag out certain aspects of my book)ANYWAYS THANK YOU, LOVELY READERS!!!
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A silent cry
Historical Fiction"and after all this time of waiting the devil would reach out to me and whisper, he's dead and you are here, how much longer will you wait, how much longer would you deny the truth, at some point, I was afraid that he would unlock my ribcage and sen...
