Calum POV
*One Year Prior*
"Aren't you happy I made you stay in school, Ave?" I smiled, as I walked towards Ava, who was wearing a graduation cap and gown.
"Still wish I dropped out with you, but this thing is kinda cool," she said, holding up her diploma. My mum smiled, and took a picture of Ava, which caught her off guard a little.
"Thanks for coming, Joy! It means a lot!" She extended her arms and engulfed my mum in a hug.
"Oh, so you thank my mum, but not me?" I pouted.
"Thanks, Cal." She rolled her eyes, and hugged me. My mum took what seemed like the billionth picture that night.
"Congratulations! I'm really proud of you, Ava! And I'm sorry your foster mum couldn't make it," my mum, Joy, said to her, with a sympathetic look.
"It's fine. Even if she wanted to come I would have told her not to." My mum pulled Ava into an other hug, and I took an other picture. I wanted to make sure this whole night was under documentation... and I wanted to be able to brag to the boys about this; my smart girlfriend. It's an understatement saying that I am proud of her.
*
Looking at those pictures physically hurt.
That was the first thing I did, when I got home. My flight got in at 8 A.M., and as soon as I walked in the door, I went straight to my old bedroom.
I pulled out the photo album from under my bed, and I started flipping through the pages, trying to find these pictures.
That was the night I decided I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Ava. I just didn't tell her, because I was too scared.
"Calum?" My attention was drawn to my mum, who was standing in my doorway.
"Mum!" I jumped off the bed, and wrapped my arms around her. "They're getting married," I sobbed into the crook of her neck.
"Who?"
"A-Ava a-and." I didn't finish, because I felt her arms squeeze around me tighter.
"It's okay, Calum. Everything will be okay. You are going to be okay."
*
"Sorry about that." I wiped the tears from my face with a tissue, then blew my nose.
"Don't apologize."
These past two hours I spent crying, and telling my mum everything on my mind. Towards the middle of my sob session, she started crying with me.
"I don't know how I'm supposed to feel."
"How do you want to feel?"
"Happy," I rushed out, immediately. "I want to be happy, but I know that I never will be, unless I just completely forget her."
"Even if you forgot her, would you be happy? I know that she was such a huge part of your life. I think that even if you did forget her, you would still feel like something was missing."
"Then how is she happy and okay? I just really wish I could forget her. I don't want to remember anything. I keep having these dreams about her, like, past memories. I dream about the things we used to do. I can't get away from these memories. I just want to be done remembering."
When I finished, she didn't say anything, she just stood up from the floor, and handed me her car keys.
"Take a drive. Clear your mind. When you get back, come talk to me."
Maybe while I'm driving, I'll crash. Then hopefully, I will forget the past year of my life.
