Intertwined

chapter twenty-three

"EARTH TO EMMY Morgan!"

I shake my head as Kayla's hand passes in front of my eyes, breaking me from my trance. When my eyes adjust, suddenly back to reality, I realize everyone has already left our afternoon meeting and it's just the two of us left in the conference room.

I sigh, sinking into my chair as I squeeze my eyes shut. "Sorry."

"It's okay," she says, heading towards her desk on the other side of the room. She sets the papers in her hand down before turning to look at me as she sits on the edge of her desk. "What's going on with you?" she asks. "Did something happen with Rhett last night? Did he end things?"

"No, he didn't end things," I say, but the twist in my stomach can't bring myself to lie to her second question. "And I think so, but I don't know. Things have... changed. At least, they have for me, but I can't read him. I don't know what's going through his head."

She frowns as she pushes off her desk and approaches me. "I thought you were going to talk to him about how you are feeling?"

Biting my lips, I drop my head as I hide behind my hands. "I know," I mumble before lifting my head to look at her. "I know I have to, and I will... I'm just not ready to lose him."

"Em..."

"Yeah," I whisper as the pressure in my chest grows. "I know."

"Look, I am not going to tell you how to play this," she says, sinking into the chair at the corner of the table, scooting the wheels until she's sitting in front of me. "But what makes you think you're going to lose him if you're honest about how you feel?"

"He's made it clear on several occasions he doesn't want a girlfriend. And I got that. I didn't want a boyfriend either, but it changed after we started hanging out. Maybe it has for him too, but on the chance it hasn't? If I'm honest, and I tell him the truth, he's going to end things and I just..." I trail off as my voice breaks. "I'm falling for him, Kayla. If he ends things, I think it might break me."

"He might surprise you."

"Or he might rip my heart out," I say, feeling stupid for being so cynical about this, but I'm terrified. "I know I need to tell him, and I will, but I just... this feels so different then my feelings for Oskar. I was sad about our breakup, sure, but I never felt like he could break me. With Rhett... everything's just so intense. Everything I feel when I'm with him, and I'm just not sure how I'm supposed to let go of that when he makes me feel this good."

She smiles and reaches forward, taking my hand in hers. "I know it's hard to be honest when you're the one that could end up hurt, but you aren't going to break. And if he doesn't feel the same way, he's a fool. You're incredible, Emmy. So fucking incredible and you deserve someone that knows what he has. Maybe that could be Rhett, but just like you can't read him, he can't read your mind. If you don't tell him how you're feeling, how is he supposed to know he has a decision to make?"

I chew my bottom lip and nod my head because I know she's right. If I don't come out and tell him the truth, tell him what I want and how my priorities have changed, how will he know? I have to be honest with him, and I have to show him what I want.

"Okay."

She gives my hand a tight squeeze. "It's okay if you want to hang onto this feeling a little longer, I wouldn't blame you, but for the record... I don't think he'll run."

And I desperately hope she's right.

✼ ✼ ✼

A few hours later, I keep my promise to Rhett and head directly to his place instead of stopping at my door. There's a twist in the pit of my stomach as I knock my knuckles against his door, Kayla's words hanging heavily over my head. I know she's right. I knew she was right before she even said anything, but hearing someone confirm my thoughts makes everything suddenly very real and even harder to ignore.