Pretty, Punk Cherry

103 ⭑ We'll be alright.

"I miss life, Harlow. I miss the happy. For a while there, we were goin' strong. And it felt really good."

"I know, baby..." He whispered.

I looked back at him as he slid his hand down my arm and took it tight.

Tilting his head, his eyes drooped solemnly, "Come inside to bed with me. Yeah?"

I nodded and pulled up my slipping cardigan.

We slunk across the beach together and walked up the steps of the deck, receiving whistling noises and thrown Hershey's chocolate bars from our friends.

It felt nice that they were trying to bring light to the situation, Koi and Kris especially. But, it didn't help as much as I wished it did.

Harlow and I crept up the creaky stairs to our room and closed the door once we were inside. It was getting late. Nearly nine o'clock.

We both knew we wouldn't be able to sleep.

So, we settled into bed together wordlessly like old times, cuddling closely. I laid at his side with my head on his chest, and my leg wound tightly around his thigh. His right hand draped down my back and rubbed it gently, while he held my other, brushing his thumb against the back of my hand.

The air in the room felt so stale. It was so dark and cool. It didn't help my tensed up nerves in the slightest. And I imagined them to be like stiff icicles on the rotting roof of my brain.

"Cher?" Harlow's nose nudged against my forehead and I shifted my head up, replying in a whisper, "Yeah?"

"I know it's horrible timing, but I've been thinking about what you said in London. About us. About the way we have sex. About um..." He swallowed and his cheeks flared up with pink. I could tell he could feel it, 'cause of the way he shut his eyes, "Fuck me, I don't know why I'm so nervous about it all of the sudden. It's nothin crazy."

"About us taking things slow?" I quirked a brow.

He opened his eyes and darted them back and forth between mine, "Yeah. And I wanna say that I'm sorry? Really sorry. I shouldn't have dismissed what you wanted when it wasn't even anything bad. I just wasn't used to the idea and all. You're the first person I'd ever be doing anything like that with. I think that's why I was so horrible about it. Intimacy and feelings, and that, I never felt them so like... intensely, until I met you. So, it feels a bit scary to me."

"I forgive you." I didn't hesitate, "And I understand. I just wish you would've told me that. You're such a big mouth except when it comes to your feelings. I wish you'd be louder about them."

"I know, I'm tryin." He huffed out a soft laugh through his nose.

"Thanks for telling me though. Means a lot."

"Yeah." He nodded.

I shifted my head back down and continued tracing my finger over his knuckle.

"Cher?"

I craned my neck yet again to give him my full attention, but before I could get words out, he cut me off with a kiss and stole them. A soft, gentle, slow kiss. Like it was our first. It was shy and sweet. Apprehensive, but needy. And it rattled my brain because of all the ways Harlow had kissed me, he'd never kissed me like that.

I reached up and ran my fingers through his hair, toying with the wavy strands to pull him closer.

He swiped his slick tongue against my top lop and let out a soft grunt before we parted, his teeth dragging my bottom out with him. He let it pop back into place gently, resting his forehead against mine.