Super Blogger

8. ANALYSIS AND ANXIETIES

"—and beneath me is none other than the iconic NC Pavilion!" As she pressed the mic with both hands, a smaller section of the screen displayed the live areal view of the building and its surroundings. I could make out the image of my car parked on the other side of the road. Then the whole screen gave way for her again.

"Oh, we actually went live." I leaned forward in surprise. "So everything was caught on camera?"

As if she heard me, Elise beamed. "That's right everything was caught on camera! From Jason McLean's advances on June Austere to Tekeon's last-minute save!"

My brows furrowed. Advances?

As if on cue, the screen was taken over by a paused video scene of me, in my white tuxedo, leaning closer to June as we discussed. Not only were deep smiles plastered on our faces, but it also looked like she was... blushing?

"End me." I sunk into my seat with a hand pressed against my face.

"Folks, forget that the world's greatest celebrities were briefly held hostage, this is huge! At long last, Jason McLean—is dating!"

"Noo!" I screamed at screen Elise.

"She's not too far away to lodge your complaint you know."

"Not now, Blitz." I dismissed him, peeking through my fingers to see her narrate the rest of what she had to say. I knew I could always clarify things with my fans. But why did I care so much? Weren't we going to end up dating anyway?

"Because of Gina," Blitz said. All my being seemed to confirm his answer. But my mind refused to believe.

"What? Like I don't want her to think I'm dating?" I laughed at that silly thought. "What does she care? What do I care?"

My heart started racing and I didn't know why. For some reason, all I could feel was a pang inside as June and Gina both crossed my mind.

I closed my eyes and reminded myself why I let go of Gina. How I was nervous to truly take my chances to begin with, and how out of touch we've been for years. I clenched my jaw as I recalled her last text before we lost touch. It was a good enough reason to not care about wherever in the world she was. But why my heart would not let go, I didn't understand.

I screamed out releasing whatever feeling was bubbling. "Why Blitz?" I slumped. "Why do I still see her when I close my eyes?"

There was a short pause before Blitz responded. That was usually rare. "I believe the right question you should be asking is who your potential partner is. The way things are, you don't know how much Gina's changed and if she would want you. What you do know for certain is that June Austere is really into you and you feel alive when you're with her. I suggest you go for her."

Elise Sally was saying something about Zen being taken in for interrogation and about how new info suggested a new monument in honor of Tekeon was underway. I heaved a deep sigh, and my head hung in silence as I tried to calm my thoughts.

Blitz spoke again. "We best be headed to the Villa, it's getting late."

Something simple. I started the engine and slowly began to speed up until I zoomed off into the night.

*****

I lay awake on my bed, wishing there was a crime alert to keep me busy. Anything but to think because my thoughts were being drifted in one direction. As I shifted under the covers, I remembered Nic's call.

My eyes lit up. That would work for a good distraction. "Blitz, call Nic."

I rolled to the edge of my bed and sat up against the headrest. The light from my phone on the side drawer slightly illuminated the dark room. At least that corner of it.