The one with the youngest Geller

1.10

The One With the Monkey
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"Guys? There's a somebody I'd like you to meet."Ross said walking into our appartment with a monkey. It climbed onto his shoulder.

"W-wait. What is that?"Monica asked

"'That' would be Marcel. You wanna say hi?"He asked

"No, no, I don't."She replied

"Oh, he is precious! Where did you get him?"Rachel asked

"My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab."

"Thats horrible"

Everyone looked at me

"Why would anyone name their kid Bethel" I asked

"Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass!"Chandler said walking over

"Ross, is he gonna live with you, like, in your apartment?" I asked

"Yeah. I mean, it's been kinda quiet since Carol left, so..."

"Why don't you just get a roommate?"Monica asked

"Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate is kinda pathe-"He stopped and looked at everyone but Pheobe "sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'really cool way to live'."He lied

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"So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide, and one about a snowman."Pheobe daid putting her lyrics on the coffee table at Central Perk

"Might wanna open with the snowman."I particially joked

The bell abvoe the door rang and Joey walked in

"So, how'd it go?"I asked

"I didn't get the job."

"How could you not get it? You were Santa last year."Ross reminded

" I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly, it's all political."

"So what are you gonna be?"

"Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face, y'know?"He said sadly

I laughed.

"What."

"Joey gonna be an elf" I said

Monica and Ross looked at me dissapoitnedly.

"Hey, do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's?"Rachel asked

We all groaned

" What is wrong with New Year's?ʻShe asked

"Nothing for you, you have Paolo. You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday: desperate scramble to find anything with lips just so you can have someone to kiss when the ball drops!!"Chandler yelled "Man, I'm talking loud!"

"Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you."She told us

"Yeah, you wish!"Pheobe shrugged

"It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday. I say this year, no dates, we make a pact. Just the six of us- dinner."Chandler said

"Yeah, okay. Alright."We all agreed

"Y'know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm."

"Woooo!"I said miserably