epilogue

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Today it will be one year since his funeral.

My life is still as deserted as it was that night and my dull moods don't help the time that slowly passes.

The classes at the university are too silent, Wooyoung has stopped animating them with San. He spends three quarters of his time in his apartment, pouring out his sorrows on the bed of his former roommate.
I often visit him with his boyfriend, although it is difficult for me to cross the threshold of the door.

That our group has grown to seven has also changed our life together.

Every activity or outing we do usually ends with a psychology session that Hongjoong conducts between sobs.

He also suffers a lot.

He sleeps most of the day. He works profusely at night on his compositions, he does not stop any more.

Seonghwa lectures him, he sees him less and less. I believe that it widens the crack of his heart. He may give lessons but his state is just as worrying.
A cigarette or two here and there.
He doesn't think anyone suspects, but I've seen him pull on the filter of a roll twice while his tears were flowing.

Yeosang is now concentrating only on his studies. During breaks his head does not lift from his notebooks, he has limited his flow of dialogue and outings with him are rare.
He is the one who has closed himself up the most despite his already distant character.

Yunho, him, keeps this magnificent smile stuck to the face, he gives us a semblance of life. He still teases Yeosang from time to time. It's fun to watch.

Then there is me, Song Mingi.

Being a little more backward, I now enjoy the privileges of being alone while keeping in touch with each member. I've gone back to dealing with their little worries as I did in the past.

In the evening, I often go back to buy a banana/strawberry milkshake and put it next to me on the bench.

We contemplate the stars together.

It is empty, dull, and suffocating.

The twinkling points unfortunately do not have any more the gift to help me as before but I let my heart express itself.

Memories flash by like the film of a cassette. Sometimes I forget the sound of his laughter, and it scares me.

I refuse to forget what I loved.

Just as I refuse to abandon the one I love.

And when I lie down on the wooden seat, I raise my arms upwards.

The constellations, I liked as much to trace them in the sky with my fingers as on your skin with honeyed reflections.

But from now on, my hobbies differ.

I just wait impatiently that our love can definitely go to ashes without the stars forgetting one of us.




















































hello my loves :,)

Well, the story is coming to an end...

I thank you very much if you are still here, it was quite a meaningful story for me. I enjoyed writing it as much as I enjoyed reading your feedback in comments.

I apologize for this unhappy ending :,)

Be well, I hope you will enjoy my future works!

I wish you only happiness and success,

With love,

Yeo

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