Break me

Twenty seven

Lorenzo

The house is eerily quiet when we walk in. That unsettles me more then if there was shouting. Mario closes the door behind me. "He was in the kitchen before I left." He motions with his head towards the swinging kitchen door. I nod my response, but I can't seem to move. He stands beside me study my face. "I can go check on him first if you want? I can see how he is."

"I can do it. I'm just nervous." I take the first step towards the kitchen. Mario just stares at me with his usual blank expression. "Stop being a pussy and go in there." I flick him off. He's right I do need to man up. "I'm going."

I walk into the kitchen and my eyes instantly fall on the full wine glasses, and the chair that's turned over. Other then that the kitchen is completely empty. I'm about to walk out and head up stairs to see if he is in his office or room, but I see the curtains hanging above the sliding glass doors blow up. He's outside.

   I step outside and I'm met with Giovanni's perfect back. His firm, muscular, sexy back. I've missed him. He is standing with one hand clutching the back of a patio chair and the other must be holding something up with the way his elbow is bent. "You're home." His velvety voice almost brings me to my knees.

  "I'm home." He still has his back to me, so I walk until I'm just behind him. He stiffens. "Are you okay?" I ask. He downs the rest of the wine he was holding in his hand, and places the now empty glass on the table. "I don't know," he clears his throat. "I've never seen my mother cry like that before, not even at my fathers funeral."

  Shit, it didn't go well. I place my hand on his shoulder and lean into his back. "I'm sorry." I don't know what else to say, I don't know how to help him. People are so cruel. We're attracted to each other, it shouldn't matter what fucking gender we are its the twenty first century for crying out loud.

  "Don't apologize to me capo, look at your face amore mio." He turns and takes my hands in his. "Your father will pay for this." He seethes when he takes me in. I don't want anymore pain. "It's okay, I'm okay. I knew this would happen. I took the risk when I told him about us." He drops my hands.

  "We are not a risk. We are in love. That's something I will never be ashamed of." I freeze on the we're in love part. He's said he is in love with me but I haven't, not yet. I may have implied it but I never said it. "What is that look for?" His brows pinch. "What look?"

  He takes a step back and motions with a hand at my face. "You look like I just told you I stabbed your cat." I take in a breath. "I don't have a cat." I try and lighten the mood. It doesn't help it makes him more mad. "We are in love, aren't we?" Yes. I don't say that though. I don't say anything.

  "Capo?" His eyes get glassy. "Did I just tell my family that for nothing?" His hand flies to his mouth. No you didn't. I love you. Why can't I say it? "Gio, I" he puts up a hand. "You never allowed me into your heart, did you?" His voice shakes and I want to punch myself.

  "Amara—"

"don't you dare blame her!" He screams. Pain making his light eyes an emerald shade. It's so unusual. His chest rises and falls at a fast pace. Tears pour from his eyes and he wipes them away fast, probably not wanting to shed tears for me. How did this happen, why am I such a coward. Everyone already knows about us.

  I'm scared, I'm scared to lose him like I lost my mother. "Gio. I don't want to fight with you," I take a step closer but he takes one back, knocking into the patio chair. "I'm sorry, it's not that I don't love you it's that I'm scared." Everything I say keeps making this worse.

  "Scared of what?" Anger, his voice is laced with anger. "I'm scared to let you in, it doesn't end well for me." He rolls his eyes and gives me an unamused laugh. "Shut up." My eyes widen and his bluntness. "What?"

"Don't bullshit me. This was just fun for you. This was just a little escape until I married your sister and you moved back to rule your empire." I go to speak, to tell him he wasn't a mistake. He wasn't an escape, but again nothing comes out. What the fuck Lo?! "But I am not your escape!"

  His words hit like a bullet. Why am I fucking everything up. Speak Lo. "I'm sorry." I reach for him and he shakes his head and my hand freezes mid air. "I care about you Gio. I care about you so much." He closes his eyes. He walks past me and stops when I speak again. "I don't want to hurt you."

  "You didn't hurt me, you broke me." He walks away from me. I want to scream at the top of my lungs. I want to re tell my father about us again, just so he can beat me. Today was suppose to be good. I was going to come home and comfort him and tell him I was with him not matter what, but I fucking froze. I stood there when he was willing to love me no matter what, and I took his heart and stomped on it.

Why Lo? Why?