The Penguin waddled towards the Dynamic Duo wearing Commodore Schmidlapp's sailing outfit and hat. He also had a fake beard stuck on his face to make himself look convincing.
However, he still carried his umbrella, held his cigarette holder in his mouth and wore his eyeglass on his eye.
"Ahoy there! Could you chaps direct me to a policeman? Commodore Schmidlapp's the name. Big Ben Distilleries, you know" said the Penguin.
He did speak in a British accent like the commodore's, but he still sounded like himself.
Batman and Robin knew who they were dealing with and turned around to whisper to each other.
"Holy costume party; that's the Penguin" said Robin.
"Obviously" Batman agreed.
"What's his game, I wonder" said Robin.
They turned back.
"What's your game, Penguin?" said Batman.
"Penguin? No, my name's Schmidlapp, old boy. Schmidlapp" said the Penguin.
His quacking also gave him away.
"Your fingerprints will settle that hash, Penguin. We'll check them against our mobile anticrime file in our Batmobile. Let's see your hands" said Batman.
The Penguin closed his umbrella and showed his hands. The tips looked like they were made of plastic.
"It looks like plastic coated fingertips" said Robin.
"Yes, I scorched myself pressing waistcoat. I do believe the attending surgeon did use plastic, yes" the Penguin lied.
Batman and Robin turned away again.
"It looks bad, Batman. This brassy bird has us buffaloed" said Robin.
"Not quite, Robin. There's one method of identification which no criminal can evade" said Batman.
"Retinal eye patterns" the Penguin interjected.
"He's right, Robin. The pattern of myriad, tiny blood vessels in the retina of the eye. As individual as a fingerprint" said Batman.
"But don't you have a complete anti criminal eye pattern master file in your fabulous Batcave? Why don't you take me there?" said the Penguin.
"You'd be willing to submit yourself to a test?" said Robin.
"Why, of course. It might be an amusing experience, don't you know?" said the Penguin.
"Stand by to catch him, Robin. I'll give him the Batgas" said Batman.
"What's that? The Batgas?" said the Penguin.
"A harmless anesthetic, necessary to prevent you from seeing the entrance to the Batcave" said Batman.
"If anyone knew that, they could pierce the secret of our true identities" said Robin.
"Ready... Commodore?" said Batman playing along.
"Oh, I say. What deucedly strange customs you colonials have. Well, I'm ready" said the Penguin.
Batman sprayed the Penguin's face with Batgas and he fell asleep.
"To the Batmobile! This could be the break we've been looking for" said Batman.
He and Robin got the Penguin into the Batmobile and drove back to the Batcave.
They checked the Penguin's identification along the way.
When they got there...
"He's the Penguin alright. I wonder why he let us bring him here" said Robin.
"We'll soon find out" said Batman.
"I'll set up the anticrime eye checker" said Robin.
"Stay on the alert, Robin. After I give him the Batwake, we must be ready for anything" said Batman.
He sprayed the Batgas again and the Penguin woke up.
"Oh, it's you. We're here, eh? I see" said the Penguin in his normal voice.
He picked up the imitation again and said "Oh, say! This is extraordinary. It's absolutely extraordinary. I must say that your laboratory exceeds the limits of man's wildest imagination. Absolutely. And could I trouble you for a glass of water? Your Batgas has left me with a somewhat parched sensation".
"Over there. The drinking water dispenser is clearly marked" said Batman.
"Oh, yes, thank you. Thank you, sir" said the Penguin.
"Help yourself, Commodore. Slake your thirst" said Batman.
