CAPTIVE | JIKOOK

In the Dark

As the cell descends into darkness Jungkook presses his hands into a sleeping position, tucks them to the right side of his face, and closes his eyes before quickly opening them again and smiling.

Jimin nods, "sleep."

The light begins to dim and hastily fades until they are left with very little light to negotiate sleep arrangements.

There is one bed, meant to hold one person. To sleep in this bed together, Jimin frowns in thought, would be almost more intimate than he can stand.

But Jungkook makes the decision for him by pushing his legs behind Jimin and laying down on the right side of the bed close to the wall. He pats the bed next to him and smiles shyly. Jimin rotates and puts his head next to Jungkook's.

They lay next to one another as twilight fades into darkness. He has a lot of thoughts in his head, things that he has been thinking about all day. He wishes he could share his thoughts with Jungkook but knows that even if he could put his thoughts into words that it wouldn't make any difference to share thoughts with Jungkook. He wouldn't understand. Jimin smiles into the fading light, how many times in his life he has uttered those words. 'You won't understand.' It seems too trivial now. They, whoever they were could understand the words, they just couldn't understand the meaning. Now perhaps it was the other way around.

The darkness thickens and congeals in the room. It is so dark, darker than he can ever remember it being. So quickly the blackness behind his eyes has become the same as the darkness of the room. Like the first time he tests it by closing and opening his eyes, there is no change and considering Jimin is from the city, the darkness is claustrophobic. He doesn't think he's ever been someplace so dark. In the city, there is always light from something somewhere but here this is nothing.

He knows this room. He knows where the walls are. He knows the shape of the room. He knows where Jungkook is, he can feel him pressed against his side. Jimin shifts trying to make the intimate situation more comfortable causing the bed to bounce slightly.

The darkness is so heavy it's suffocating. His breath quickens. He closes his eyes hoping that the darkness behind his eyes is less intense. He can control that. He wants to tell himself that there is nothing in the darkness that can get him but in this place, he knows that's not true.

He concentrates on breathing, trying not to focus on the oppressive darkness, the black, the absence of light. His breath hitches in his throat.

'Focus, focus, focus,' he screams in his own head, he breathes all of his air out forcing himself to have no options next but to breathe in. He fills his lungs as full as possible and then pushes the air out again. But the focus on breathing does nothing for his fear of the absence of light.

He feels the bed shift and bounces as Jungkook adjusts against him. With the absence of sight, his other senses seem heightened. Jungkook's shifting makes the bed sway and bounces for ages; it reminds him of being in a row boat on the ocean. He decides at that moment that the bed is complete crap. His stomach clenches he feels queasy. He assumes it has everything to do with the darkness and little to do with the bouncing bed. Silently he curses for reminding himself about the darkness.

But the thought is pushed out of his head by warm breath ghosting against his jaw and along his neck. At this moment Jimin is overcome with the intimacy of the moment. He is lying snuggled up next to a boy...a man. He's always struggled with this concept of what point a boy becomes a "man". He didn't consider himself a "man" but certainly wasn't a boy at least in the technical sense of the word.

'Fine,' he cleared his thoughts. Here he was snuggled up next to a boy approximately his own age, he had a moment of realization, he hadn't even bothered to find out how old Jungkook was, he hadn't even bothered to ask.

'Stop!' He commanded. HERE he was snuggled up to someone who he had only met that day. Snuggled more intimately than he'd gotten in his last relationship. God, he could barely remember her name, she'd barely lasted two weeks, Misun, or was it Sooyun? He couldn't believe he can't even remember her name. This seems like such a stupid thing to fixate on. If he ever got out of this to write his memoirs or to give some type of interview, he was totally going to edit this part out. He'd tell people he thought about his family or something. What kind of stupid person fixates on trying to figure out the name of the girlfriend from their last relationship which had lasted an amazing thirteen days. What a stupid thing to spend time thinking about. He could feel his nonexistent readers and audience tuning out, he was fucking tuning out.

Maybe this is what it felt like to go crazy or maybe this is how his brain was dealing with the stress of being kidnapped and held hostage. Maybe this is what all his brain could wrap itself around, inconsequential facts that he couldn't even remember. So, this is what the last months or weeks or days of his life would come down to? He wouldn't think about his family, or how to escape or even how to fuckin' solve world hunger. Nope he was going to try and remember some girl's name that had lasted in his life for thirteen days. This was so redicu...Hana her fucking name was Hana! Well at least that was out of the way.

He had solved the mystery which he had intently been focusing on but with that logic problem out of the way he realizes that he is still in the oppressive darkness. It hits him like a ton of bricks and suddenly he wanted to try and figure out another logic problem to keep his mind off the darkness.

Jimin adjusts not because he was uncomfortable but almost more for something to do. Something to take his mind off of the darkness. He lets out a puff of air and feels it blow back at his face. And suddenly he get his wish. He is no longer thinking about the darkness. Instead he's thinking about the fact that Jungkook is less then a breath away from him, literally!

Jungkook is close. He was thankful and overwhelmed at the same time. The intimacy of the closeness is suddenly more claustrophobic than the darkness but he can't move away, there is nowhere to go but into the black and that is more claustrophobic and overwhelming then the intimacy.

Overwhelming intimacy was a word that incapulsated and defiend the night. He had never been an anti touch kind of person. He had known those kinds of people. The ones that you couldn't hug, that you had to give distance to. He's never really been terribly afraid of intimacy. But he had always been careful with who he had shared that space.

He was drawn from this though by Jungkook's hot breath ghosting against his neck. Jungkook was closer then he remembered, probably shifting while Jimin was trying to work out Hana's name or while he was freaking out in the darkness.

They were sleeping together in a bed made for one. There was no personal space in this bed. They were intimately pressed against one another. Jimin could feel every inch of him that was pressed against his body as if his sense of touch was heightened with the darkness.

He could feel Jungkook's right arm slug across his body, he didn't remember how or when that had happened. His hand was resting on Jimin's back, his fingers gently tickling a slice of exposed skin. Jungkook's right leg was also slugged across Jimin's body. He could feel the contrast in heat from the upper thigh to his calf which was ice cold. He almost wanted to wrap his own legs around Jungkook's cold ones to warm them up. But he couldn't bring himself to move.

He was sure that by morning they would be even more wrapped around one another. He sighed trying to get comfortable with the thought. He couldn't, it just didn't sit right with him.

Jungkook nuzzled into Jimin's neck. Jimin froze, he could feel Jungkook's cold nose pressed into the crook of his neck. It made him shiver. How could his breath be so warm and his nose be so cold?