love will tear us apart- robin buckley

12.

mels pov:
it had been 3 months since the incident.
3 months since billy and hopper died, 3 months since everyone changed.

it was about 3:30pm and i was sitting on my bed listenig to joy division, drawing and sketching in my notebook. i was drawing a fimiluar face. a ton of freakles, an adorable nose, pretty eyes, soft lips, short hair. i was drawing what was on my mind.

i was drawing robin. every since 3 months ago, i havent been able to stop thinking, like they're was a continuing cycle of my thoughts, and they were most of the time repeated.

is max okay right now? how is eleven doing? i wish i was with robin. i really wish i pushed billy out of the way- i should have been the one who died that day- i shouldn't be here- nobody needs or wants me.

-were the main thoughts. i just couldnt seem to pause my brain and kept on replying billy dying, maxes scream, elevens horror on her face when hopper wasnt there, even robin and steve flirting, they so obviously liked each other and didnt even try to hide it.

love will tear us apart- by joy divison played after, my brain instantly began to think about me and robins sleepover about a month ago.

flashback• 8/6/85
—
we were smiling, listening to my music, i was showing her a band i love, the first song i had showed her was love will tear us apart. we had my vinyl playing, in my basement with my door shut. it was just pass midnight and we were hanging out, painting each others nails.
~

"alright, have you ever heard of joy divison?" i said smiling at the girl infront of me, getting up from my bed going over to my shelf full of records, turning to her for a response."uhhhhh, dont get mad at my response, but no" she said giggling. her laugh was so adorable it was like music to my ears, but i didnt like her, i would never like her, i liked guys, and guys only, i thought to myself frowning.

"im sorry i didnt think it was THAT bad" robin said thinking i was frowning at her response, "no its fine, because now you know!" i said smiling again, grabbing the record from my shelf, sliding it into its place ontop of my big record player.

it started spinning as i sat back down next to robin. when routine bites hard and ambitions are low,

the song sung. robin was laying under my covers and smiling big, i went under the covers with her, sliding my legs under the blanket as i felt her warm legs brush against mine, i softly layed my head into my pillow, flipping on my side to look at her, she fillped to her side, looking back at me.

and we're changing our ways, taking different roads, the song continued, i opened my mouth to sing along with it, almost humming it, "love, love will tear us apart, again" i hummed along with it, and hummed it again as it repedated the same lyrics.

"love, love will tear us apart, again" i was smiling so hard in such a long time, i had forgetten all my problems in that moment, it was just me and robin in the middle of the night, nobody home, music playing, smiling so hard at nothing, feeling eachothers warm breaths every second, sharing the same blanket centimeters apart.

robin giggled at me, "you're such a dork" her laugh made my heart melt, my mouth dramaticly and sarcasticly gapped open. "ow"
i said, "so do you like it?" robin smiled, "yes, i might have to get a vinyl myself" she said, "really?" i asked making sure she wasnt being sarcastic, "yes dummy" robin laughed.
~
we were talking about some random shit when robin randomly asked me, "how long have you liked steve?" i slowly dropped my smile and looked up confused, "wha- what do you mean" i asked, "come on mel, i see the way you stare at him" robin spoke.

maybe i did like steve? i dont know, i've never really ever been intrested in a guy before, i wish i was more intrested, like boy crazy, or did really like steve. i was so clueless that i didnt even realize that the person who i liked was right in front of me.