Escape

But What Does it Mean

Am I crazy or is Yelena kissing me?

Yes.

The feeling of her lips on mine sobers me up instantly.

Holy hell, I didn't know kissing someone could feel so damn good. I feel numb, like air floating up into the clouds but at the same time I feel it everywhere; a rush from my head to my toes.

I melt right into it, her lips matching mine perfectly as they dance together. Wanting to deepen it, I swipe my tongue across her lip asking for entrance to which she grants me.

I'm feeling all of it: the fireworks, the butterflies, a jolt of electricity; they're all going off, rocketing around my stomach, reaching the tips of my ears, my fingertips; sending goosebumps rushing over my body.

I want more.

I start pushing her back against the floor, moving myself on top, keeping myself hovering over her with my arms by her head.

But she pushes me back, breaking our kiss. An intense panic settles over me.

"Sorry. Sorry, I didn't mean to push you.. I was just getting into it and I thought you were too, I am so sorry I misread the situation. My intention was never to-"

She smiles. A smile that sets my heart drumming and the world spinning. My rambling apology stops.

"It's okay, Dani. More than okay. I want to ease into this. If that's okay?" she smiles. Then worriedly, "Was that okay for you?"

I'd say it's my turn to smile, but I haven't stopped, "that was way more than okay."

I see her visibly relax, "good. Good."

"And we can go at whatever pace you're comfortable with. I'm not in any rush, I want to enjoy this. Whatever this is.." are my cheeks as red as tomatoes? Cause they feel like it. I really hope I didn't already mess this up.

But I see a blush spreading across her face and reaching the tips of her ears, so I release the breath I didn't know I was holding.

"Thank you.. it's not that I didn't enjoy it, because I did, a lot. I just.."

I reach out for her hand, "hey, it's all good, Lena. Your pace. And you can kiss me anytime you want," I wink, and somehow her blush deepens.

I think I broke her, she doesn't say anything. Her eyes are wide. And we're just staring at each other like a couple of teenagers realizing what love feels like for the first time.

Ugh- er- crush. It's a crush?

Whatever. I certainly don't mind. She's entrancing.

I could do this all day.

"So.." she starts.

"So." I move my fingers so they're entwined with hers, rubbing my thumb across her knuckles.

"So. What does this mean? Uh. What do you want this to mean?" She looks down at our hands, focusing on them.

Ah the good 'ol 'what are we' question.

"Well, I like you. Like really like you," I wink at her, liking the effect it had in her last time. And this time. It's noted.

"I.. really like you, too."

I fall back into the bean bag chair, pulling her with me, her body falls between my legs, her head resting against my chest as I look back up to the sky. Her sweet giggle echos in my ears.

I close my eyes so I can properly soak up this moment, loving having her so close to me, not quite believing it yet.

Damn. I had no idea we were out here for so long. The sun is about to set casting a warm glow across the sky, oranges and pinks painting the clouds.