Double Trouble Disco Dance

22

"It's difficult for me to distinguish if you've gotten better or worse," Zhongli hovered over Childe. 

"Maybe I just like being underneath you, Highness, ever think of that?" Childe grinned. 

"Is this how people flirt in your country?" Diluc watched from afar, with the pink fox resting on his head. 

"What do people do in yours? Go on dates? That's borning, King," Childe rolled onto his side, not trying to get out from under Zhongli in the slightest. He just faced Diluc. "Or, are you falling harder for my spouse?" 

"What's the true meaning of this duel, Emperor?" Diluc crossed his arms. The pink fox's tail swished back and forth. She crossed her paws, amused. 

"Why must everything I do have an ulterior motive?" Childe sighed, sinking his face into the grass. 

"Because you're the emperor, Your Majesty," Zhongli stood up. "Emperors must always consider several actions in advance." 

"And, how many emperors have you known?" 

Zhongli stared, not willing to answer. He shook his head slightly and turned around, folding his hands behind his back and walking toward the palace. 

"Did I ask something I shouldn't have?" Childe stood up, attempting to follow, but the pink fox jumped off of Diluc's head and rushed to his feet, circling them. "You'll trip me!" Childe danced around the small animal and ultimately did fall on his ass. The pink fox jumped into his arms. 

"It would appear that you'd asked something a bit too on the nose," Diluc leaned up against the tree and closed his eyes. "I suggest you apologize when you have the chance." 

"Why would I take advice from you, King?" 

"Because, what other friends do you have at the moment, Emperor?" Diluc smirked. 

...

"It's the day of the duel and you're here having your hair done?" Scaramouche tapped his foot angrily while staring at the two. Childe was resting his head on Zhongli's lap as he toyed with his hair. 

"It's soothing," Childe replied as if that could explain everything. 

"Shouldn't you be training or something?" Scaramouche waved his hand. "Do you not realize what this means? What if you lose? That essentially will prove Signora is right and that she should take your place." 

"None of you have any faith in me," Childe wiped away an imaginary tear. 

"Do you think that because you're Tartaglia's brother you've absorbed all of his skills?" Scaramouche snapped. 

"Do you think because I was in a traveling band of performers I didn't have any training?" Childe smiled without revealing an answer. 

...

"We are gathered here today to entertain our lovely Mondstadtian friends," Childe turned in a circle, gesturing to the crowd, "but also to solve a rather pressing issue. Our lovely Signora presumes me to have gone soft and is even claiming I am not who I say I am. So, to assure you all that her claims are unfounded we shall have a duel." 

"We'll both be using these blunt poles," Signora threw one at Childe for him to catch. Her hair was tied up and for the first time, she was wearing pants and standing in front of him. He was caught off guard, used to her wearing lavish gowns, that he failed to notice her make the first move. Dodging by a hair's width, he tilted his entire body. Zhongli sighed from the stands, holding his face in his hand. 

"Are you not certain your spouse is going to manage this?" Diluc leaned closer to him to ask. "Wasn't he known for his vicious battle skills?" 

"There is nothing in this world that I am certain of anymore." 

"Shall we make a deal of our own?" Diluc smiled. 

"Are you asking me to place a bet with you?" Zhongli raised an eyebrow slightly. 

"It'll give him motivation and you a wonderful opportunity to say 'I told you so.'"

"Are you certain you're not related to that Abyssal Prince?" Zhongli stared. "You're acting a bit like him." 

"Did you meet him before that night?" Diluc crossed his arms. 

"Did you?" Zhongli looked back at the duel. "I don't generally get involved with bets, King Diluc. However, I shall humor you this once as His Majesty did claim this duel for your entertainment."

"Then," Diluc grabbed his hand. "If I win the bet, and your emperor loses, will you give me a chance?" 

Zhongli pulled his hand away and placed Diluc's back on his own lap. The weapon Childe had been using shot up into the stands and nearly struck Diluc in the face. It lodged itself into the wall behind him, cracking it. 

"My apologies, King," Childe laughed off the attack with ease, even though his eyes held no light. "Would you mind giving that back?" 

Zhongli lifted his arm without standing up and pulled the weapon straight out of the wall. Diluc stared in awe, wondering at the levels of strength that would require. Zhongli threw the weapon back down for Childe to grab. He immediately used it to block an attack from Signora, who had tried to sneak in while he appeared distracted. 

"If I win, you'll owe me a favor," Zhongli stated. 

"What kind of favor." 

"You'll find out when the time comes," Zhongli's lips curled just a tad.