Holy Sin | | JJK

30

"No, you freaking prick, you piece of shit, you God damn Motherfucker. Don't you dare pretend that you didn't know what you were doing or what it would result in. You stupid, dumbfuck Bitch, you knew it. And if you cry I'm gonna fucking kill you."

I speak to the girl in the mirror. I glare at her. How stupid this hoe can be.

And how stupid I am!

See, blaming it all on a fucking reflection.

Jungkook has been dressed up and went somewhere out of the hotel. And I was still in the bathroom.
Seriously, for one hour I have been here. Cursing myself in every language I know and it still feels less.
He had clearly stated that it is all for pleasure and it's gonna be a secret forever.

Gonna be a secret that we Fucking fucked while he was in a relationship.

Wow, did I just fall for that jerk all over again just to get my heart broken all over again?

How can I be so dumb and stupid?

Why do I always forget who he is and how it ended between us?

I threw my head back as finally those tears I was holding back in for so long rolled down over my cheeks.
I feel helpless.
Me loving him so much always makes me feel so helpless 

He is so good in luring people. He knows how to use his charms. He is such a manipulator and I can't even blame him because I am the one who fell into his trap willingly.

But honestly, I still want him to be near me. I still want him to hold me like I'm his entire world.
And I don't care what reasons he has behind it.

Call me a hoe, slut, whore, I don't care. I'm all for him. And only him.
I don't care how heartbreaking this is going to be in the end.
I'm risking it all for Jungkook. He doesn't love me. I do. And that's my problem.

And I can't afford to let him go this time. Not again.

I know how dumb and selfish this is but when the world doesn't care about me why should I care about it.

I turn the shower on letting the cold water hit my soft skin. I let all the thoughts drown with that water.

Let's just go with the flow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I push the door barging inside my house. Throwing away my shoes and stuff I lie down on the couch.

Oh my God.

It feels so good to be back at my house. I can literally be caged here forever and never complain.
Trust me, I'm perfectly, truly, religiously a home buddy.

The long journey really exhausted me. Jungkook's driver has dropped me off to my house and I was grateful for it since I wouldn't find a cab so late at night.

I threw off my clothes putting on my night pyjamas before I fell on my bed sleeping like a dead meat.

The night went by fast and the only time when I opened my eyes was when the doorbell of my house kept on ringing.

I'm not a heavy sleeper so I was instantly on alert mode.
Letting out a very ugly yawn I ruffled my hair licking my dry lips.

The door bell was still ringing and it was morning already. I sat like a dummy for a while before standing up to get the door. Who was ringing in the freaking morning.

My stomach growled making me pout my lips.

Did I skip a meal?

"Yes coming. Stop playing with the doorbell." I shouted in annoyance before opening the door.

My eyes were half closed as I stood with my left hand on my hips and my right one leaning on the door frame.

"Who is—" My eyes widened as I cut off my words. My hand slipped from the door frame.

"Y-you?" I squinted my eyes in confusion.

The person in front of me didn't bother to greet me and barged inside my house going right to the kitchen keeping the bags in his hands on the counter. I rushed towards him.

"Why... Why are you-you here? It's..." I turned my head to look at the wall clock. "...7 in the morning?" He shrugged his shoulders already serving the food on the plates. I scoffed rolling my eyes.

"Jungkook this is my house?" I state walking beside him.

"Did you eat last night?" He asks. I pout my lips leaning on the counter.

"Nope, I guess." He glances at me. "I knew it. I told you to eat when you reach home since you didn't eat anything in the plane too." I shrug my shoulders picking up the almonds from the bowl. "I forgot." Okay, aren't we having a very casual conversation?

He scoffs at my words dragging me to the dining table.

"Whatever. Why are you here?" I ask keeping my hand on the chair as I turn my head to look at his figure walking in the kitchen like it's his.

"Told you. I don't like eating alone. Looks like I didn't have anyone to eat with me today too."

Again with that bullshit. It's so hard to understand Jungkook. One moment he's this heartless jackass and the next second he turns to a complete baby Kookie.

"Okay, wait. I didn't even wash my face. I literally just woke up." He snaps his finger.

"Yes. Did you change your habits? You are a morning person."

And that wasn't supposed to affect me. Like yes, we have been together for four years, he would know stuff about me but him stating facts about me did a strange thing in my stomach.

He remembers.

I cleared my throat standing up.

"I was... I was tired. So I overslept."

Why was I explaining him? Anyways, if I stay here for another second I'll go crazy.

I stood up to walk to my bathroom but stopped by his words.

"I love those shorts. Shows your pretty nice legs." I turned around only to find him sipping his banana milk leaning on the counter while checking me out.

That's when I realized that my night wear is so so revealing.
But who cares? Not like he haven't seen me naked already.
A smirk tugs on my lips as I raise a brow.

"Really? Wanna wear them too." He chuckled winking at me. I rolled my eyes going back to the bathroom.

And then minutes later we had already eaten our food together and now the two of us were in the kitchen.
I was washing dishes and Jungkook was distracting me.

I mean, he had his hands around my waist as he left wet kisses all over my neck.

I loved it.

"Babe, how long?" He asked nibbling on my skin.

"Wait... I am almost done." I speak drying my hands.

He turns me around making me wrap my arms around his neck.

He leaned down pulling me closer as he smashed his lips on mine. He caged me between the counter as he pulled his shirt over his head.

I wanted to ogle at his perfect sculptured body but he was kissing me hungrily. Trying to literally eat my lips.

I moaned into his mouth. His hands slid inside my shirt and just as they were about to reach my breasts, the door bell rang.

Again.

He stopped his actions. Groaning he threw his head back. I giggled pecking his lips.

"I'll be right back." I quickly rushed out to open the door.

As soon as I opened it, my jaw fell on the ground. No. Not right now. This can't be happening. I blinked my eyes letting out a shaky breathe as the person in front of me stood with a wide grin. I whispered to myself.

"Ji Ho."