Ahsoka Tano One-Shots

Ahsoka The Zombie

"That's a lot of pills," Rex whispered.

"What are we going to do with her?" Echo groaned.

"Maybe I should just stun her," Fives suggested, hand on his blaster.

"What?! N–"

"Oooh, who are we stunning?" Jesse joined them at the table.

"The commander," Fives grinned.

"No, We a—"

"Count me in," Jesse said in a sing-song voice, cutting off Rex.

"Jesse, we aren't–"

"Ready?" Jesse lifted his blaster.

"NO!" Rex shouted, smacking Jesse's blaster down. "Stand down, trooper. We are not stunning the commander!"

"Aw, a shame," Jesse pouted.

Ahsoka laughed, "You were actually going to stun me?"

"Whoah, you look awful," Jesse gasped, looking at Ahsoka for the first time. "Did a zombie bite you?"

"Ugh, for the last time, I am not a Zombie! What is it with you all and zombies?!" Ahsoka snapped.

"Well sorry for telling the truth," Jesse pouted, crossing his arms over his chest and turning his nose up.

Ahsoka sipped her caf again, then dropped her head onto the table. She looked miserable.

"We should really do something, though," Echo whispered, shooting a glare at Fives. "Other than stunning the commander."

"Ugh. Okay," Fives sighed.

"Ooh!" Jesse beamed. "How about we drag her down to the med-bay and tell Kix to sedate her?"

"No," Echo huffed. "That's almost as bad as stunning her."

"How about we make her inhale chloroform," suggested Fives brightly.

"What is wrong with you?!" Rex hissed.

"Lots of things," Echo rolled his eyes.

"Ooh! How about we lock her in the maintenance closet and make the darkness put her to sleep," Jesse said.

"No."

"I know!" Fives held a finger up. "We could make R2 electrocute her until she passes out!"

"No!"

"I could hit her on a pressure point," Jesse volunteered. "Really hard. That'll put her out for a while."

"NO!"

"What if we hypnotize her?" Fives asked in a creepy voice.

"I don't think we could if we tried."

"I've got it!" Jesse declared. "We could put a whole bunch of fuzzy blankets and fluffy, puffy pillows in the cargo bay and make her lay on it and then sing her to sleep!"

"Jesse," Rex looked Jesse square in the face.

Jesse beamed. Was Rex about to praise him for having a good idea?

"That is the stupidest idea you have spat out of your fat mouth today," Rex deadpanned.

"You think of something, then," Jesse pouted.

Ahsoka laughed. "You're all idiots."

The clones looked up from the small circle they'd been whispering.

"You know I can hear every word you're saying," Ahsoka pointed to her head. "Montrals, remember?"

"Which idea was the best?" questioned Fives expectantly.