Memory Lane

Chapter 15. The Talk

Tara

I pulled into Teller-Morrow with only one thing on my mind; to confront Desiree about keeping her distance from Jax. I wasn't necessarily a jealous woman, but the leniency and obvious affection Jax had for her was driving a wedge between us. Before she came back into our lives, Jax never held secrets from me, whether it had to do with club stuff or even silly little things like dreams, we told each other everything. And he would have certainly never given money to someone behind my back, especially if it had nothing to do with business or the club.

The stunt he pulled this morning made me angry, but most of all it got me thinking. I mean, Jax knew how important it was that we stocked up money to eventually leave Charming. We didn't just hand out large sums of money to people without consulting the other. He knew how awkward it was for me now that Desiree was back, and he did nothing to aid my suspicions when he gave her money. He practically handed her five grand like it was five bucks! While he knew full well that we didn't always have thousands just lying around. His actions hurt me and made me curious as to what kind of game Desiree was playing with my husband.

She most certainly had to know that he still had a soft spot for her. To be honest, who wouldn't be? Given the circumstances of her reappearance, how would anyone be able to handle having their loved one come back from the dead? It was obvious that they were madly in love, and who's to say that their love died when she did?

Anyways, regardless of what feelings still remained, I needed her to know and respect my boundaries. As empathetic as I am towards her situation, I would have much rather-ed her find the remains of another family and stay away from mine. Was there no one coming to claim her, or did they all magically disappear when she did?

As I approached the building, I saw Desiree and Lyla talking while she vacuumed her new car. It wasn't anything shiny or new, but it seemed like a nice ride for five grand. The two girls were conversing and laughing as I approached and they seemed to be getting along. I noticed Desiree's new haircut under the baseball cap she was wearing. It was a total 180 from how she looked when I met her, and it didn't look bad on her.

"Hey," I said interrupting their chat. The two women fell silent when they noticed me, "hi Tara, how are you?" Desiree said replying. She shut off the vacuum and handed it to Lyla.

"I'm good, I just wanted to know if you have a minute so that we can talk." She looked taken aback at my request and glanced at Lyla before agreeing to talk with me. I led her to the benches that were in front of the club doors and we sat down.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" she asked removing her hat from her head.

"Look, I know this transition has been hard for you. I mean, coming back here and having to rebuild your life again... takes guts. And I know how difficult it must be to see Jax moved on-"

Desiree smiled to herself, "no offense Tara, but where is this going?"

I sighed, "I know about the money that Jax gave to you this morning, and I honestly am coming to you as nice as I possibly can."

"Okay, so spit it out," her face was serious as she waited for my response. She straightened herself up in her seat and looked me straight in the eyes. I couldn't tell if she was challenging me or trying to intimidate me, but either one would rile me up.

"I'm going to need you to keep your distance from Jax. I don't need you guilt-tripping or playing with my Ole Man's head and making him give you things; that includes money, favors, or anything else you think I can't manage on my own."

Desiree stifled a laugh, "excuse me? When did I ever ask Jax for anything since I got back? The money that he offered me, was purely his own decision. And besides, I had stashed five thousand away when we were married, so he most likely was just returning it."

I tried not to let the new information deflate my confidence. I had no idea that she had done that through their marriage. It only made sense now why Jax would even give her that much. This could have all been resolved had he told me about it sooner.

Desiree eyed me carefully and she sucked her teeth, "something tells me that you didn't have all the information before you came at me sideways."

"Sideways?" I questioned.

"Tara let's not pretend, I am far from stupid, I know that you don't like me. And from what I hear, you don't like much of anything or anyone that connects Jax to Samcro. But since you are his Ole lady, I think you would be the first to know, that you never go behind your ole man's back and insert yourself in a situation you can't handle."

I scoffed, "I'm a big girl, I can handle my own sh**."

"Sure, and you're handling it great, blindly of course, since you don't have all the information. And I'm sure that Jax has no idea about our little sit-down."

"He has bigger things to worry about," I said plastering a fake smile on my face.

"I'm sure he does, yet here you are worried about me...Don't big girls, have big things to worry about?" she said cocking her head at me.

I could feel anger rising from within me. Desiree was nothing like I thought she would be. The woman before me was completely different from the shy woman I met earlier. Her face was hard and cold and she radiated confidence.

"Look, I'm going to forget this happened. I'm going to forget you came here, and this can be our little secret," she started to get up from the bench to leave.

"Excuse me?" I shouted.

"Tara, it's obvious that you are projecting here. What are you feeling? Edged out? Insecure? Shaking at the thought that your husband might still be in love with his first wife?" I recognized the tone she was using to be mine. She was mocking me and that only made me angrier.

"Who do you think you are? Oh, what?" I got in her face, "you think Jax is going to come back to you? Reunite the family you once had? I already see through your little game and how you've already gotten Gemma on your side. But don't worry, she always feeds off the weak anyway."

Desiree smiled and she looked at me with adoring eyes. "You know, you raise a good point. Who was I to think that Jax would want me back? I mean, here I was concerned with scrounging up what was left of my humble biker wife life, and I didn't even think about how it would affect my ex-husband's wife." I could hear sarcasm drip through her voice as she continued, "it must be so hard for you that I came back to the only family I had left. However, you should know better than anyone that when you go missing for a decade, not everyone lives. But silly me for coming back to the only place I called home, unlike you who would rather see it burn in the distance while you drive off in the sunset."

She turned away from me and grabbed her hat off the table. She placed it on her head backward and turned around to look at me with a snicker. "By the way, I know why you're so upset, I mean, I would be too if I found out that my husband was having wet dreams about his ex."

My mouth dropped a little, how did she know about that? And who said he was dreaming about her? Did Jax tell her directly, or did someone else? He didn't even want to speak to me about it, but somehow she knew?

"I don't know what you're talking about," I tried to save face.

She made a face, "oh, sorry he probably didn't tell you after he jizzed on himself." She smiled to herself while she began to laugh, "Damn, I wonder what position I was in? Do you mind asking him for me? I would love to know. Thanks for the talk by the way!" She walked off as I was left there to collect myself. I could hardly contain my emotions as I saw her talking with Lyla who carried a shocked expression on her face. I wanted to scream, but most of all, I wanted to snap Desiree's neck.