𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙚𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩

631 9 5
                                    

y/n's pov:

i told jj where to go to once he had arrived in London her asked multiple questions but i want to tell him in person and not over the phone. my eyes flutter opened and i look to the side and see jj there with his hands on his head. 

y/n: j

jj: y/n what happened 

y/n: i cut myself and nearly overdosed 

jj: why would you do that to yourself

y/n: umm

jj: y/n 

y/n: rafe, told me that he was just using me

jj: im going to kill him

y/n: no jj dont, look im here im fine, im alive

jj: barley 

y/n: whats that supposed to mean

jj: you tried to kill yourself

y/n: look im going home later today please can you stay with me

jj: yeah yeah ill stay

-

  me and jj get back to my apartment.

y/n: j

jj: yep

y/n: can you check the bathroom to see if they cleaned the mess please. 

jj: sure

whilst jj checks i go to my room to get my clothes ready after i shower. i hear a voice behind me.

y/n: jj

rafe: its me

y/n: rafe

he walks out from the corner of the room. jj shouts the bathroom is clean.

rafe: tell him you will be out in a minute.

y/n: fuck you

he runs in front of me and shuts the door before i can get to it.

rafe: dont do anything you will regret.

y/n: what you going to hit me, you like hitting girls rafe

he pushes me against the wall by my neck. his grip becomes tighter.

y/n: rafe

i struggle to say.

rafe: dont, dont, your going to wish you were nicer to me

y/n: your a fucking psycho 

he slams me against the wall and then down on the floor.

rafe: your a slut

i hold my neck whilst trying to get up.

rafe: stop fucking crying.

y/n: jj

i scream.

rafe: shut the fuck up

y/n: help me

he covers my mouth. i start to cry even more. "why are you doing this to me" i muffle.  i hear footsteps. "hey y/n/n is everything okay in there. "say yes or ill kill you" rafes whispers. he slowly removes his hand. "um yeah just dropped my deodorant bottle, ill be out in a minute". "alright, ill make some food". rafe whispers "ask him to put some music on". "hey j put some music on as well anything is fine". "alright now were getting into it". jj says happily. 

y/n: why are you doing this to me

rafe: because i love you

y/n: bullshit, if you loved me you would be the one out there cooking for me

rafe: want me to prove it

before i could answer her starts walking out into the kitchen. i hear them having a conversation but its all mumbled. Before i know it two loud gun shots go off. i run out to see rafe smiling and jj on the floor will a pool of blood surrounding him.  i scream at the top of my lungs "jj, what did you do to him, help him". "you wanted this" rafe says to me smiling. i run to get my phone. "hello 999, hello my name is y/n y/l/n, im in apartment hello is anyone there. i look at the top corner of my phone to see if there is any signal. "did you cut my line off" i say. he points the gun at me. "rafe, please ill do anything". he pulls the reload back until it clicks. his index finger pulling the trigger back bit by bit until......BANG!. i wake up struggling to breathe i grab the side of the bed. "woah whats happening" rafes says. "what did you do". "what are you on about y/n". "you shot jj" "y/n i didnt do shit, jj is all the way in the obx". "what" i say in confusion. "no we went home and you shot him". "y/n ive been here with you all night, it must have bin a dream" "but it was so real" i say to myself.

-

today i get to go home, finally back to my own bed in my own clothes. obviously me and rafe are still on awkward terms well because of what has happened over the past couple of days. i get to my apartment and drop my bag on the floor as i take a sigh of relief. its so good to be home. i go to the bathroom, and im so glad they cleaned everything up because if they didnt i would throw up everywhere. well not everywhere, but you know what i mean. i am so tired even though for the past two days all ive been doing is sleeping and sleeping its like even doing nothing is tiring at this point and the only way to escape it is to sleep and sleep, without eating drinking or even shower how gross that is i know but you cant help it if you want to escape a life you dont want to be in. especially when someone just told you they were using you for your body, when you loved them if any one of you are reading this want to know what it feels like well straight up, it feels like somebody has just brought a new glass at a vintage store and your very delicate. you go home and the take a hammer and just start smashing you into tiny little pieces until there is just dust and then your left with nothing but fear. fear that if you put yourself back out there every guy you meet will do the same, but the thing is it felt different with him. rafe was special in a way he saw me in a way that i could never see myself and i think thats what made me fall for him. his eyes, his smile, his hair, his body god him he is something, i love him, i love rafe but you cant be with someone you love and they dont love you back. but the thing is i dont need him but i want him. i want to feel his hands, his touch on my body. his lips on my cheeks and lips. i want him but i dont need him. what if i cant handle myself and i call him then he will think ill forgive him for anything hell do but i guess thats on me, he's a playboy. i...need...you...rafe...cameron...

a/n

sorry guys i got really into my feels at the end lol;).















𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙗𝙤𝙮| Rafe CameronWhere stories live. Discover now