Infatuation

Chapter 7

   My Dad stalks towards me slowly. I can't see him, but I can see his shadow, and hear his voice. He is taunting me.

"Your mother deserved to die. You could have stopped her death. You just a coward. I can't believe I raised a coward as a daughter. Come here, Monroe! Prove to me that you aren't a coward!" My hands start to shake and my breathing gets heavier.

   The sound of a gun goes off, over and over again. Just a singular one. Always the same sound. I run faster. Pushing myself past my limits.

   "Where are you going? There is no where to go! I am everywhere!"  As he finishes the sentence a version of him appears in front of me. A scream escapes my lips.

   This isn't him though. Not necessarily. His face is all twisted with anger. His skin is dyed crimson. It slowly drips down his face. I turn around and start to run away from him.

   The footsteps behind me get closer and closer. My calves start to burn. Closer. Closer. Closer. Something lands on top of me and I scream.

   I flip over to fight back. On top of me is my Mom. This isn't my Mom. Its a decaying body. The flesh is meltng away. She is a sickly pale, but I know its her.

   "This is your fault, Monroe. You could have stopped him." She spits at me. As much as I hate seeing her like this, her voice is the same as it's always been and I crave to hear more.

   "No it's not." I say calmly.

   "Yes it is! You let him shoot me! You just stood and watched. You are terrible human being. I can't believe you are my daughter. No one will ever love you. EVER!" She accuses.

   "Stop it!" I yell. I no longer want to hear her voice. Its not her. Its not her.

   "You are such a disappointment! You pretend to grieve but that's all a lie! A show you put on for your brother," tears fall from my eyes, "you should have been the one to die. This is all YOUR fault." She screams at me.

   "No! No! Don't say that! I love you!" The sobs rack my body, "I love you!" She puts something to my head. The sound of metal rings in my ears.

   "I know you do, baby. I know you do." I scream and the gun goes off.

   "Monroe! Monroe, wake up!" I jolt up. Frantically I look around. Where am I? My eyes land on Sodapop and I remember. I'm safe. Everything is okay. I'm safe.

   Sodapop isn't the only person that's in my room. Ponyboy is standing by the door and Dally is kneeling on the ground next to my bed. I take deep breathes.

   "Are you okay?" Ponyboy asks.

   "Yes, I'm fine. I'm sorry I woke you guys up. I really am." I tell them. I bring my head down to my hand. My face is wet with tears. I hurriedly wipe them away.

   "Are you sure?" Darry asks me.

   "Yes. I'm fine. You guys can go back to sleep." I tell them. The only person that moves is Ponyboy.

   "Goodnight, Monroe." He says as he leaves.

    "Goodnight." I reply. Darry follows Ponyboy out. He gives me a sad smile. I return it. Dally stands up and sits on the side of my bed. Sodapop stays standing by my head. His hand is still on my shoulder.

   "Go to bed, Sodapop." Dally says. Sodapop pats my shoulder and leaves.

   "You want to tell me what that was?" Dally asks.

   "It was just a nightmare. I'm fine." I mumble.

   "Stop saying that! Everyone knows you aren't. Stop pretending you are." He says angrily. I look at anything I can without having to see his face. I don't need to see the disappointment there, too.

   "Dally?" I whisper.

   "Yeah?" He replies.

   "Can you stay in here?" I ask. He sighs.

   "Yes." He pulls the armchair from the corner of the room and sits down in it. I turn away from him so I don't have to see him staring at me. It doesn't help. I can still feel his eyes burning holes into me.

   "Go to sleep, Monroe." He says softly.
 
   "I don't want to have another nightmare." I admit.

   "You won't. I promise." He whispers. I let my eyes fall.