You Are The Reason

21

Noah

It's been 5 hours since morning. The doctor said operations needed to be done. My mate hadn't woken up yet so she was in a critical stage for now. She could go into stage 3 coma for both not waking up and for getting operated. The sick feeling of worry didn't leave me at all.

Despite all the comfort from my family, I was still a broken mess. I've been sitting, standing and pacing around this place. They tried to force me to go home but failed. They knew what a mate does to the other so they understood me and left me alone. Shawn tried joking with me but that didn't work. My best friend tried to make me laugh but that too, didn't work. I wasn't gonna leave this place without my mate.

Last night I called Darla to tell her that I had found Kerry. I told her that she was with me. Darla asked if she could speak to her so I told her the truth that she was poisoned and excluded the major details. The woman was full on panicking and asking if she could visit her but I told her that it will be better to see her when she gets well. She agreed after being persuaded afterall she was Kerry's mom.

I could see how pale her skin had gone through the night. It was as if she was getting sicker and sicker by every hour. I had called the doctor to check on her. When he did, he said that it wasn't a good sign. I was forced to sit outside while they operated on her. I know I would have died if I witnessed her in so much pain but then I also don't want to leave her in there with them. This all just felt exactly like ripping my heart out of my chest. I felt so alone.

I had a dream last night. The most terrifying one I've had in ages. I saw that Kerry was bleeding so much while I was tied to silver chains as she bled out and... until she couldn't anymore. I've had many of them and I didn't want to revive them.

If the godess permits, I would give my heart out to this girl without a care in the world. I just don't want anything to happen to her because the pain I feel now is worse than the pain she could feel. Once Shawn had joked with me that women have twice as much pain receptors than men do, I didn't believe it but I did realize after meeting Kerry.

It's amazing how I started caring for her in such a short time. I was careless. Carefree. Now I feel like I am useless. I couldn't do a single thing for her when she got hurt. I would have ripped Chloe into shreds until I was satisfied but I needed to be here with Kerry.

"Alpha Noah."

I looked up from the ground towards the male voice. The doctor looked at me with neutral emotions. I got up and looked at him with so much hope that could have killed me already.

"Luna is safe now. We managed to remove the metallic pieces from her body. Her condition is stable now. But there is something I have to tell you."

I nod because I'm in no position to talk. I feel weak all over because his expression gets sad.

"Luna could never give birth." I sucked in a sharp breath. "The poison had spread through her system and it damaged her capacity to reproduce. I'm sorry to say this, Alpha. But it's not her fault. She's our strong luna and I know that you won't disregard her even if she can never be a mother of your child."

"Why would I do that?" I finally asked. "I will never replace her with someone who can give birth to my first child. I love my mate and I'll spend the rest of my life with her no matter what." I stated truthfully.

"I'm glad to hear that. Some mates get agitated with the idea of not having pups."

"If Kerry wants then we could adopt a child. That would be our first child."

"You'd make up a great dad one day, Alpha. And our Luna would be just as great as you. You can see her now. She should be awake anytime soon." He smiled.

I nod and go inside.

I intertwine our hands and kiss the back of her knuckles. After a few minutes, her eyes flutter open and she looks around the place. Confusion and pain etched on her features makes me want to kiss them away. When her gaze lands on me, she just stares and stares. I break the silence by kissing the inside of her wrist. She shivers but doesn't say a word.

And then she is entangling her fingers out of mine. My chest pricks and aches as if a thousand thorns were etched on to it. She moves her gaze away from me.

"Kerry, I'm sorry. Please just talk to me." I begged.

Her green eyes settled back on me, tears blurring her vision and aligning on the bottom eyelids, ready to fall down. She closed her eyes and winced maybe from the pain. Tears escaped her eyes. I leaned forward and wiped them away.

"Please tell me what's bothering you. Should I call the doctor?"

"No." She whispered.

At least she talked to me. This is the first word I've heard from her since two days.

"You're hurting?" I strained out.

She nods. "I feel... like I can't... breathe."

I rub my nose against hers. The sound of the heart beat machine increases and she stares at me. My own eyes fill up with tears.

"Feel any better?"

She caresses my cheek with her thumb and then suddenly, her eyes droop close. Panicking. I run out the door and yell for the doctor. He hurries in immediately.

"Don't worry, she's tired. She lost so much blood and I have sedated her with medicine so she will come and go out of consciousness."

"Ok."

Relieved, yet a little jumpy, I fall asleep on the chair beside her bed.

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