You Are The Reason

19

Kerry

The forest is where he brought me to. Except for the crunching of the gravel underneath our shoes, the chirping of birds, and the sound of flowing water, there was silence between us. Noah was really quiet. Exceptionally quiet.

His warm hand was enclosed in mine. The expression on his face was of concentration and seriousness that kind of scared me. I have never seen him like this. I wasn't gonna judge though. This was all about getting to know each other. He deserves to get this chance of explaining himself to me because he confessed his heart out. I didn't want to be that girl who broke his heart. Noah's honesty and generosity deserves a chance.

We crossed a clearing and approached a small empty lakefront. There was a sign that said 'Beware!' and I wondered what for. Noah removed his hand from mine. For the first time, I felt empty and nothing. I didn't know if I was supposed to be scared or confused. However, my heartbeat remained rapid.

Noah stood before me and walked away, without turning his back, a few feet. His whole demeanor had changed and there was that vulnerability in his eyes.

"You'll have to believe everything you're going to see now. I won't be able to help you if you can't."

He walks away, leaving me in the middle of nowhere.

"Noah? Where are you going?" I asked frantically.

There was no answer. He just kept walking away until I couldn't see him anymore. I slumped down against a tree. Tears threatened to escape but I didn't allow them. Loneliness was something I was used to until Noah came. Was I gonna get all alone again? The thought scared me.

Goosebumps realigned my arm and I shivered. I yearned to hold his hand again. I wanted to feel safe and feel like he was always going to stay. Was it too much to ask?

A minute or so later, something was approaching me from the direction Noah went. My breathing shallowed as I recalled the same wolf from that day. What pulled me to it was the golden set of eyes. Through the meadow of the sunlight, its brown fur looked like gold.

I frowned. This creature had a hold of Noah's clothes in his mouth. I stood up and moved closer to him without thinking of the consequences. He purred. I bent down on my knees and gently ran my fingers in his fur. It snuggled deeper into my hands making my frown disappear and making me feel safe again.

"Where is Noah? Why are you holding onto his clothes?" I asked.

He only purred.

I don't know but I felt the need to do something really stupid to see if it works or not because I was desperate. I picked up a stick and carved Noah's name on the ground. The wolf looked up at me curiously.

"Have you seen him?"

He nods. I try another question.

"Is he out there?"

He shakes his head. "Then where is he?" I mumble to myself. The wolf nudges his head on my legs and drops the clothes on the ground.

"Can you take me to him?" He again replies by shaking his head.

"Why not?" My voice raises as some of my frustration shows up.

Suddenly, I'm tackled on the ground and the wolf is on top of me. The golden gleam in his eyes aren't terrifying at all. And the position isn't even terrifying to me. I was supposed to be scared but I wasn't. I felt safe and sound. I felt warm. I felt like I felt with Noah. His snout rubbed against my neck and he smelled me. Then I noticed something odd about this wolf. The scent. He smelled exactly like Noah.

"Did you h-hurt Noah?" I stammered.

He snorted and shook his head. Thank God.

"Then why do you smell like him so much? Is this normal?"

Another shake of his head.

My eyes took notice of his brown fur. They were a perfect shade to what Noah's hair were. His gold eyes had this unusual shade of brown in them, the brown that Noah had. He looked like Noah and that confused me.

I recalled Noah talking about his scent, speed and all the other things he talked about with me. If I could relate then it would be related to this one.

"Are you Noah?" I whispered.

His eyes glimmed brighter than ever. He nods making my eyes widen at the absurdity of my question and the situation. He moves to the side and let's me get up.

"How do I believe that?"

Maybe I asked too much of it because the next thing I know is that the wolf is changing to a body form of a human. A male body. And then I see Noah right infront of me. I'm not imagining right?

"Kerry... you figured me out." He rasps.

I turn around because I didn't want to see him naked like that and I was confused as to why I wasn't getting a heart attack yet. I heard the sound of clothes being put on and when he was done, I didn't turn towards him.

"Kerry, talk to me please. Your silence is killing me."

I kept his body heat behind me as he turned me around to face him. His sadness was surfacing again and I yearned to make it go away. I had the urge to wrap my arms around him really badly.

He's about to touch my cheek but I move back accidentally. I must have flinched because I see the hurt in his eyes. Noah moves forward with every step I take back. My back hits the trunk of the tree and I'm trapped. My breathing labours as he places his hands on both side of my head and leans down to my level.

"I want to know what you think of me. You know I'm a werewolf now which doesn't exist for the human world. I'm sorry I scared you with it. No one of my kind is allowed to expose themselves to humans but when it comes to someone special, we can do so. Only they have to figure out and if they can't, then... the council would erase their memory."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Werewolves have mates, Kerry. Soulmates, other halves or what ever you wanna call them. It's rare to have a human mate but destiny allowed me to have you as my mate. Remember when you asked me the reason for my living? I didn't lie when I said that it is you. Kerry, I swear I fell in love with you in the very instant I saw you, that's how mates are. But I was confused like you. Everytime I spent time with you, I fell deeper in love with you. I'm only yours, mi amor, only yours." He said.

I have nothing to say. My brain seems to not function when I'm near him like this. I needed to think about all this. I needed time.

"Please say something." He pleads.

"I have to go. I need some space, Noah. I need to be alone."

"Kerry-"

"Please."

I start walking away and then end up running. I don't know where I'm going but I do hear him calling out my name. At a far distance of I don't know where, I slump down against a tree and let the tears I've stopped fall freely.

...

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