Drowned but Not Out

Chapter 1

Meredith Grey woke up to her phone ringing asking if she could come to her mother's nursing home; she's reassured repeatedly it's nothing bad but it was imperative that she got there quickly.

The reason why?

Ellis Grey was lucid.

Great, this is just great. Meredith thought to herself.

The staff at the nursing home felt that Ellis would accept the news of her Alzheimer's diagnosis coming from Meredith. Meredith silently scoffed at this suggestion, given that everything that she did before her mother had gotten ill was wrong and quite frankly, uncivilized. It was something Ellis Grey had no problem telling Meredith about either.

After telling her mother the truth of the last five years, Meredith was forced to jump into doctor mode when Ellis had a heart attack which sent them both to a trip to Seattle Grace Hospital.

Everybody told Meredith how lucky she was that Ellis was having a lucid day, they all marvelled at how wonderful the great Ellis Grey was. Only Meredith knew the truth, how cold and cruel the woman who gave her life could be.

You try spending your entire childhood being told you're not good enough, being screamed at for getting an A-, for being blamed for your mother's marriage AND affair breaking down. You all would avoid her too if you had the same childhood I had.

Ellis Grey proved this after summoning Meredith to her room since she was hiding from her mother, when she tried to have a conversation with her daughter, with the attempt of getting to know her only child.

"So, tell me about yourself."

Meredith's dumbstruck.. she's never been asked that before. Especially by her mother.

"What's your life like? I.. I really do want to know you, Meredith."

Okay, here goes..

"Well, I have a boyfriend."

Meredith finds herself smiling at the mere mention of Derek.

"Does he understand the demands of your career? Cause not all men do. They say they do upfront but they.."

"He's great. He's a doctor too, so he gets it."

"Good"

"He's actually.."

Was Meredith just about to name this elusive boyfriend to her mother?

She took a deep breath, but then she was cut off.

"Have you chosen a specialty?"

Meredith's smile is slowly fading as the conversation turns towards the hospital and her career.

I should have known, my personal life was and will never be an interest to her.

"No, it's.. it's still early."

"Cristina's already chosen cardio-thoracics."

"Yeah, well, I guess I'm just waiting to be inspired. I'm happy now. I feel like I know.who I am plus I think when you have someone in your life that you love, you really love, I think that's.. I don't know I just.. I'm really happy."

Disgust is all over Ellis Greys face.. an impression Meredith recognises all too well.

"What's happened to you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're happy? You're happy now? The Meredith I knew was a force of nature, passionate, focused, a fighter. What happened to you. You've gone soft. Stammering about a boyfriend and saying you're waiting to be inspired. You're waiting for inspiration? Are you kidding me? I have a disease for which there is no cure. I think that would be inspiration enough."

Apparently being happy isn't allowed either anymore. I should of known. I was clutching at straws anyway. Nothing good ever sticks with me.

"Mom.."

Meredith needed to defend herself. She needed too.

"Listen to me, Meredith. Anyone can fall in love and be blindly happy. But not everyone can pick up a scalpel and save a life. I raised you to be an extraordinary human being. So imagine my disappointment when I wake up after five years and discover that you're no more than ordinary. What happened to you?"

And there was that word again.

The word Meredith heard throughout her whole childhood.

Ordinary.

She's grown up to believe that to be ordinary is worst than being.. well, whatever the worst thing in world is.

Meredith Grey is clearly just ordinary so she left her mothers room with one thought.

What's the point in carrying on if I'm just ordinary?

Hey guys! We hoped you enjoyed! Thanks to my cowriter natkat28