Drowned but Not Out

Chapter 21

TW: SH, suicide

Meredith races through the halls of Seattle Grace, hearing yells telling her to stop running. Of course, she ignores those.

I've got to get out of here! I need to go! I can't take this anymore!

She runs quickly down the stairs, figuring it would be easier than taking the elevator in terms of people she knows seeing her. After all, she does know a ton of surgeons since she's an intern in this hospital. Plus the fact that she's wearing a hospital gown is very suspicious.

Luckily no one is in the staircase when she runs down it. She makes her way to the main floor of the hospital and sighs in relief.

I've made it. Just a few more steps and then I'm out of here. I'm sorry I just can't be here anymore. I'm sorry Derek, Cristina, Bailey, I just need to do this. I hope you'll understand someday.

Meredith runs through the main doors of the hospital.

"Hey!" Some hospital employee yells. "You in the gown! Are you a patient?"

Meredith ignores the employee and runs faster before they can grab her.

The employee turns to a colleague and says, "We have an escaped patient!" To which the other responds "Wait, we already have one! That must be the escaped psych patient! Meredith Grey!"

Since Meredith already was far enough away from them they went and made a phone call to let the Chief know that they saw her running out of the hospital.

"Hi, we've had a Meredith Grey sighting. She just ran out of the hospital. Yeah she's too far away now for us to grab. Yes, we tried. She kept running." The hospital employee said.

The Chief then notifies Derek that someone has seen Meredith leaves the hospital and he quickly grabs Cristina and the two of them decide to go out searching for her. They run out to the parking lot and into Derek's car. They start driving all over Seattle, hoping to find Meredith before it's too late. They both know how suicidal Meredith is and have a feeling she's going to attempt to take her life now that she's escaped from psych.
. . .

Meredith runs and runs all over Seattle. She doesn't care where she goes, all she knows is she needs to be done with her life.

She sees a tall bridge over water and she decides that's where she's going.

I just can't do this anymore.

She walks over to the bridge and stands near the edge of it, looking out over the water.

I can do this.

It'll be better for everyone if I do this.

Okay.

I've got this.

Just gotta climb up there

Meredith climbs up to the high part of the bridge and stands on the edge of it.

. . .

"Derek, we have to find her before it's too late!" Cristina panics.

"I know Cristina! Don't you think I know that? She's suicidal! And now she's escaped psych!" Derek yells frantically. "Hey, there's a figure up on that bridge."

"You don't think it could be Meredith do you?" Cristina asks nervously.

"Let's go see." They drive closer and quickly park the car a little bit away from the figure on the bridge so they don't frighten whoever it is.

They walk closer and all of a sudden Cristina gasps. "Derek! That is Meredith! She looks like she's about to jump!"

"No! No! No! We have to stop her!" Derek runs closer with Cristina following closely behind.

"Meredith! Don't do this!" Derek yells.

Meredith looks at them and they see tears running down her face.

"I-I c-can't do CATS MEOW t-this anymore. I-I w-want to d-die. My l-life I-is WOOF h-horrible. I-I don't w-want to l-live *tut* anymore!" Meredith says while crying.

"No Mer! You have so much to live for!" Cristina says to her person. "I need you!"

"I-I d-don't h-have *tut* a-anything t-to live f-for CHRISTMAS a-anymore." Meredith shuffles a little closer to the edge.

Cristina looks at Derek nervously. "Do something Derek!"

Derek gets closer and grabs Meredith's wrist but she somehow pulls it out of his grasp.

"Meredith! I love you so much baby! I can't live without you. Please come down from there!" Derek yells.

"I-I'm s-sorry." Meredith whispers and prepares to jump.  She bends her knees to jump and right as she starts to jump she is grabbed from behind. "L-let me g-go! L-let m-me die! J-just l-let m-me d-die!!!" She sobs.

"No Mer, I can't let you go." Derek says sadly.

"L-let me d-die! J-just *tut* l-let m-me d-die! I-I d-don't want to l-live anymore!!!" She sobs trying to hit Derek with her tiny ineffective fists.

Derek carries her to the car and places her in the backseat with Cristina. Cristina holds Meredith in her arms as Meredith sobs.

"C-Cristina!" Meredith sobs.

"Shhh, I've got you." Cristina strokes Meredith's cheek. "You're okay Mer, I'm here."

"D-don't w-wanna *tut* live a-anymore." She whispers.

Derek drives back to the hospital and pages Dr Wyatt who immediately comes down to the pit.

"She was about to jump off of the bridge but I grabbed her as she started to jump." Derek said sadly.

Dr Wyatt looked at Meredith in the bed. "She needs to be restrained. I know her tics are bad with the restraints but she escaped and tried to commit suicide again. The restraints have no choice but to go back on." Dr Wyatt has a nurse grab restraints and they go to put them on Meredith.

"N-no! S-stop!" Meredith sobs.

"It's for your own good, Meredith. Why did you attempt again?"

"T-the meds a-rent MEOW w-working. I *tut* c-can't take t-this a-anymore."

"I've told you they'll take some time to take effect. It's not instant."

Dr Wyatt puts the restraints on Meredith's wrists and ankles as Meredith sobs.

"I w-want t-to d-die. J-just l-let m-me *tut* d-die a-already!" Meredith wails and tries to fight the restraints with no luck.

Once Dr Wyatt has Meredith back in her room, restrained, she goes out to talk to Derek.

"I feel like this might be her rock bottom Derek."

We hope you liked! Thanks to my co-writer natkat28