Just Pretending

Chapter Thirty

~Chapter Thirty~

"So, what did you want to talk about?" I asked Louis who was sitting in the drivers seat of his car.

He wanted to go somewhere private and this was the closest thing to it we could get with all the paparazzi outside.

We drove behind the hospital where they couldn't find or see us, well we couldn't see them at least.

He took a deep breath and cleared his throat, "Okay let me start off with..I'm so sorry for what I did. I shouldn't have cheated on Eleanor, no matter how much I wanted you..It was wrong."

Wanted me? Louis..wanted me.

No. Focus on what he's saying, don't fall into another daydream now.

"Did you tell her?" I looked down and averted his eyes. He wasn't the only one ashamed for what happened.

"Yes..we broke up."

My head shot up and eyes grew wide, "Louis I'm so sorry I could talk to her for y-"

"I broke up with HER." He starred deep into my eyes, "She was hurt but said we could work it out..but I told her I didn't think it would be that easy."

"Why?"

"Because I don't love her. I'm in love with YOU." He said it so softly but I heard a slight urgency in his voice, like he had been waiting to tell me for forever.

I was out of breath. Everything I have ever wanted was right in front of me and this time, I could have it.

So why was I feeling doubtful?

"I don't know what to say.."

And I didn't, I couldn't control what was going on in my head..I didn't even know what was going on..but It wasn't like I'd thought it would be.

"You don't love me?" He swallowed hard and held back tears.

"Louis, Im so in love with you it hurts." I whispered, "But I don't know if I can get hurt all over again. I don't know if I can take much more of the heartbreak. I'm scared of what's going to happen in the future."

"That's not what you're afraid of." His stern voice brought my full attention back to him.

"You're afraid of letting go of the past. And by past I don't mean me and James, we talked about that already. You're afraid of what's already happened. Listen," His voice softened again and he brought his hand to my face, "One of the simplest ways to stay happy, is letting go of the things that make you sad. There's going to be times where you will face problems and I can't promise you that I'll fix them, but I can promise you that you won't have to face them alone."

God, I was so in love with him. Everything he said, everything he did, and every part of who he was. I loved all of it and more.

"So what do you say? Want to face life together?" He smiled and leaned close to me, placing his other hand on the other side if my face.

"More than you know." I pressed my lips against his and once again let myself go, but this time with no fear. No pretending. No regret. Just love.

"We should get inside, they're going to wonder where we are." I laughed once we pulled away.

"So let them wonder." Louis brought me back into another kiss. I felt him smile against my lips and I couldn't hold back mine either.

"But you're right." He sighed and pulled away once again, "Tonight we're having dinner at your place though."

"Or, we could go on a real first date?" I rose my eyebrows and bit my lip.

Louis' face lit up and he nodded, "I'll pick you up at eight."