A Mothers Love

Ch. 18

A/N: this is a complete shit chapter... just letting you know. I keep writing all these through writers block. Sorry if you don't like it, and  theres only like 3-5 chapters left.. so.. i literally feel so bad about this update though forreal. 

KAROLINE’S POV

 

I got up out of bed and walked to the door. I hadn’t opened it to anyone but doctors in three days. Bea had sat outside my room periodically for those three days. I had gotten numerous texts from everyone, so I turned off my phone. Bea was out in the hallway; she fell asleep. I opened my door and sat next to her.

 

“This has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me. You are the most perfect person in the world, and you have no idea how much I love you. I don’t want to hurt you. I know I am going to end up hurting you. I am sorry. I love you so much, but please don’t keep coming back. You don’t have to keep coming back,” I started crying so I stopped.

 

“I’m going to keep coming back because I love you,” she said without looking up.

 

I tried to stand up, but she pulled me back down.

 

“No, baby. You can’t shut me out. Not now. I am not going to leave you. I will never leave you. Believe me. Okay?”

“Okay. I give up, I feel like I can’t do anything right.”

 

“Baby, you can. It takes time. You just need time to heal. Time, just take some time,” her voice cracked at the end.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“For what?” she asked. She pulled me up and walked me into my room.

 

“For everything. I just don’t want anyone to get hurt. I don’t want to hurt anyone anymore.”

 

“You letting us in will give us hope. You shutting us out will hurt us. We don’t want you to shut us out. None of us.”

 

“I don’t want you guys to see me like this. I don’t want anyone to remember me like this,” I cried.

 

“You could be the worst looking person in the world, but we would still remember you as the most beautiful one.”

 

“I love you so much; you always know what to say,” I smiled.

 

“I just say what I feel and hope that’s enough. Do you wanna go eat lunch?” she asked. I looked at her with pleading eyes.

“Anything, I will bring you anything. I know you haven’t eaten. I can tell, your under eyes are sunken in. Your stomach is begging.”

 

“Can we just go and see what’s in the cafeteria?” I asked. She nodded.

 

“Anything,” she smiled. She helped me up out of bed and took my hand. “It’s been awhile since I have been able to hold your hand,” she smiled, “I miss it; I miss you.”