Redeemed

Ch. 31

Frowning, I reached up and pulled off an apple gone bad. Its soft, squishy skin released a rotting smell, and I could see several holes where pests had invaded. Throwing it on the ground, the fruit burst, sending chunks of flesh flying. Several worms wiggled free, distraught at the sudden change. No longer would that apple provide nourishment.

But it wasn't the only fruit on the tree. Dozens of healthy, gleaming fruits hung heavy. No, one bad piece of fruit did not mark the end of a tree, just as one bad moment did not always mark the end of a person's story. I paused for a moment to watch the sun rise higher, its rays spreading warmth and light everywhere.

***

"See what you make of this!" Something dull and hard pounded me in the shoulder, causing me to jerk forward. A rock clattered to the ground.

"You didn't even make her squeal. Here, let me show you how it's done." Knowing what was coming, I covered my head as another rock, nicking the bars with a clanging sound, hit me between the shoulders. I bit my tongue to keep from crying out, blood filling my mouth. I swallowed it back down.

The guards had been throwing rocks at me for the past several hours, especially after word got out about what I had done to their companion. Not that I blamed them - I would be pretty upset too if one of my cohorts was killed. When the first rock came sailing at me, I had grabbed it, meaning to throw it back at the guard's face, but the fire quickly left me, my hand dropping the rock back on the ground.

Part of me dropped the rock because I felt like I deserved the beating.

Most of me dropped it because I just didn't care anymore.

Since then, the guards had kept it up, coloring my back with bruises. It would probably pass for an expensive abstract painting at this point. All I did was curl into a ball and focus on the nothingness growing inside.

What was the point of trying, of fighting, of growing close to another when that other person could rip everything away so easily? Why care how others treated you when in the end the nice ones tore you apart more terribly than the perceived mean ones? This pelting of the rocks and my sore back was nothing compared to the shreds of my heart that somehow still beat within me.

Eventually, the guards grew bored flinging rocks and spitting on me. I remained curled up, not moving. As the sun faded under the horizon, food arrived. Some kind of mush and a cup of water. My stomach growled, not even a rendered heart able to stop my body's needs, but I ignored it, turning away from the food.

"Think you're too good for this fine meal?" a voice chided. "If it's too good for your stomach, maybe it'll do for your person!" Slop and water landed on me, drenching my clothes.

The impact shocked my body into jumping up, and I immediately started flapping my arms to get the extra food off. Laughter erupted.

Looking up, I saw the entire perimeter of the cell surrounded by Nathairi watching the show. I waited for my natural reaction of anger to erupt, for my face to grow hot, for me to run screaming and clawing at them. Instead, the hole of emptiness grew bigger.

I wasn't sure which was more alarming - the abuse or the absence of feeling.

Sitting on the ground with my knees pressed to my chest, I buried my head in my lap, willing all of this to go away, to be sucked into the nothingness of myself.

The mush started solidifying and smelling as the night wore on, and soon I was shivering from wearing a wet shirt. Not caring who saw, I took my shirt off, exposing my bare skin with the wrap around my chest. With the dampness gone, the shivering stopped, though goosebumps rose on my arms. Eventually, exhaustion set in, and my body fell into an uneasy sleep.