Merlin One Shots

Once and Future Queen

A/N: I love Gwen so much she's so underrated when it's basically her show while she deals with a bunch of idiots

Plot: Just a Gwen centric fic

Gwen was no stranger to hardship.

When her mother had died, her father and brother were left to mourn, while she was too young to even understand what was happening. She'd spent years clinging to what few memories she had, desperately trying to keep what was left of her family from falling apart.

She failed at that. When Elyan had left without so much as a goodbye, she couldn't help but feel bitter towards him, and towards herself for not being good enough. But she wouldn't let it show.

Instead, she put a smile on her face, refusing to let her father have something else to worry about. She got a job at the palace, as a handmaid. Gwen had heard stories about the royal family, so when she had been assigned to tend to the king's ward, she was more than nervous. Still, she continued to smile, determined to not let herself falter. Quickly, she found herself warming up to Lady Morgana, and might even consider her a friend.   

The prince, however, was another story.

Gwen had heard stories long before she ever began to work at the palace, and after spending time there, her suspicions were confirmed. He was thick headed, stubborn, and could be cruel to anyone he deemed to be unworthy of attention. But, when he sat at dinner with Morgana, there was something different about him.

Despite his many... shortcomings, he would always go out of his way to help Morgana when she asked for it. Even if it meant defying his father. Morgana had wanted to learn to use a sword, and when Gwen had expressed her interest as well, Arthur was the first to offer to teach them. It was then that Gwen could see his hidden potential as a fair and just.

But hidden potential was nothing without the right person to bring it to the surface.

Then Merlin had come along.

Gwen's first impression of him was... interesting. She had both admired and been appalled at the sheer boldness he'd demonstrated when he met Arthur. She was partially convinced that he had a death wish of some sort when he would repeatedly put himself in the prince's path, and then had the misfortune of becoming his manservant. Her and Morgana had a running bet to see who would cave first, Arthur or Merlin. Surprisingly, they both seemed determined to not let the other get away with anything, and Merlin kept his job.

When the sickness hit Camelot, Gwen felt her resolve beginning to crumble on the day her father had gotten sick. She'd confided in both Merlin and Morgana, both of which proved themselves to be good friends. But even then, he was the last of her family, and the smile she'd always worn faltered. Miraculously, her father had recovered, and for a small moment, she allowed herself to think that she was allowed some sort of fortune in life. But, the moment didn't last long. Next thing she'd known, she was in a jail cell, unable to do anything but wait for death. The hours she'd spent there were agonizing, and she would spend her time silently begging anyone, anything, that would listen to keep her father safe after she died. When Morgana and Merlin came to visit, she put the same smile on, refusing to let either of them have one of their last memories of her be one of sadness. She wanted them to remember her as she always tried to be- strong.

But when the guards came, it wasn't to take her to the pyre. Instead, they were followed by Morgana and Merlin, and even Arthur. When her chains had been unlocked, she felt like sobbing in relief. But still, she promised she would be strong.

That silent promise stuck with her for weeks, months, even years to come.

The first time she nearly broke her promise was when her father died. She screamed and cursed at the world, at Uther, at herself, even at her own father for leaving her alone. Every part of her wanted to give up, to just lay in her home and hope that she would be allowed to die like her father did. For a few days, she let herself be weak. She let Merlin comfort her, and she'd let him hold her as she sobbed into his shoulder. She let Morgana give her several days off, while sending some of the other servants with food and other goods to make sure she would still eat. She even let Arthur help, and almost broke down when he promised to send messengers out in search of her brother.