Merlin One Shots

Rage

A/N: Me, to Merlin- aren't you tired of being nice?

Plot: in which Merlin gets to finally snap like he deserves

"You betrayed me."

Three words Arthur never thought he'd say to Merlin. Merlin, who was his closest friend, the person he'd trusted most. Merlin, who now had Arthur's blade pressed against his throat. The sorcerer's blue eyes flashed with uncertainty. King Arthur let out a shaky breath, refusing to let the wave of emotions to break through his calm facade.

"Arthur, think carefully about what you're doing-" A cold stare from her husband caused Gwen to falter in her speech. Her posture was tense, as if she was ready to defend this sorcerer from the man she claimed to love. Guinevere's immediate reaction was to help Merlin, and that hurt Arthur even more. His closest circle of knights were there, but it also meant that the circle of knights closest to Merlin were there as well.

Gwaine stepped forward, his sword in hand. He pointed to the dead witch that lay on the other side of the throne room. The witch that Merlin had just killed without even breaking a sweat. "Arthur, he just saved us. There's nothing just or fair about killing him."

"What's 'fair' or 'just' about my friend being a traitor of the worst sort?" Arthur spat. "He doesn't deserve to be in my kingdom."

When the king glanced back at the sorcerer while he spoke, he felt afraid.

In all the years he'd known Merlin, he'd known a simple, but caring person. Someone who was always ready to do whatever it took to help those in need. He would even go out of his way for a stranger if he could. But now?

Now, Merlin was filled with fury.

"I don't deserve to be in your kingdom?" Merlin repeated. He let out a dry laugh, one devoid of all humor. "Arthur, without me, you wouldn't have a kingdom." Arthur opened his mouth, though he wasn't sure what he wanted to say. Merlin held up a hand, and the king's mouth slammed shut at the same time that his sword flew out of his hands and across the room. "No, it's my turn to speak. And for once in your life, you will listen."

Suddenly, Arthur was flying backward through the air, and was dropped unceremoniously on his throne. He met the stunned gazes of both his wife and Gwaine, who just looked at him helplessly.

"Let me tell you a story, Arthur." Merlin began. His expression was dark as he started to pace back and forth in front of the throne. "Where should I start? How about when I saved you, all those years ago, from the dagger that the sorceress threw at you? I used magic then. In fact, I used magic to drop the chandelier on her in the first place! And you'd think that that would be it, right? But no, it was just the beginning."

"Merlin-"

"I said, let me speak. So I got stuck with a lousy job, and an awful employer that I was supposed to take care of. And then, surprise! I'm part of this big prophecy that involves the prat I got stuck with, and turns out I'm supposed to protect him! Which, wouldn't be so bad, if it weren't for the fact that he has a new assassin or magical creature after him every week." Merlin ran his hands through his hair, stressed. "But it's fine, nothing you can't handle. After all, you're supposed to be the most powerful warlock to ever exist, a few complications aren't too difficult."

There were a few soft gasps at the statement, but Merlin ignored them.

"It's all going just great, minus the fact that it's only been a year and you've already almost died more than a couple of times. Then, the Questing Beast shows up! And suddenly, one of your only friends is dying, and no medicine can save him. So you offer your life in turn for his, and you're prepared to die for the man that has done nothing but abuse his ranking the entire time you've known him."

Arthur winced. Merlin had tried to give up his own life in his place? He knew Merlin was an idiot, but still...

"Oddly enough, even that isn't good enough. So instead, you keep on living, keep on sacrificing everything for the man who has looked at you like you're the dirt beneath his boot."

"Now hold on, I've changed-" Arthur argued.

"Yeah, but how long did that take?" Merlin raised an eyebrow as the king stammered to find an answer. "Arthur, I'm just getting started. I've sacrificed so much for this kingdom, for you, only for it to not be enough. I watched you run a sword through the heart of the girl I loved, and yet I stayed- for your sake."

"I had no idea." Arthur whispered. He glanced at Gwen, who looked like she wanted to hug Merlin more than anything else in the world.

"Of course you didn't." Merlin said dryly. "Just like you had no idea when I had to save your life a thousand times over. Just like you had no idea that I was the one who stopped the dragon from destroying Camelot. Oh, did I mention that I also watched my father die?" Merlin's lips stretched into a tight smile. "That was fun. But hey, I inherited his dragon lord powers, so it all worked for the better, didn't it?"

"Dragon lord powers?" Gwaine muttered. "That would mean-"

"Balinore." Arthur closed his eyes as all the pieces began to fit together.

"Yes, Balinore. Remember how he wasn't worth my tears?" Guilt felt like a dagger in the king's chest. "And so the cycle continues." Merlin's voice trembled. "Over, and over, and over. I stopped Morgana from killing you before anyone even knew she was capable of such a thing. I gathered the men you needed to take the kingdom back from her. And for a while, things were alright. We were happy. But then both Morgana and that evil witch of her sister came back, and unleashed a curse upon this land. You know, I planned from the beginning that I was going to walk into that portal for you, Arthur? I was going to be the one to sacrifice my life, but then I had to go and get fatally wounded. But apparently, it wasn't fatal!" Merlin stretched his arms out, looking upwards. "I guess I'm just not allowed to die, huh?" His yell shook Arthur to the very core.

Gwaie looked like Merlin's speech was tearing him apart from the inside. In fact, all the knights had a similar expression. Gwen looked ready to burst into tears, or maybe she was filled with a similar rage that the others were. Rage that Merlin had experienced any of this, and he had done it alone. Arthur wanted to step forward, to comfort him, to apologize, to take back everything he said, but it was too late. The damage was done.

"I've spent years working to keep you safe. Whether it was being pushed around by you, being beaten, nearly dying, living through torture, and life being a personal hell," Merlin growled. "It was worth it. For you. For my friends and family that lived here in Camelot. For everyone. But please, your majesty," Merlin bowed mockingly. "Tell me more about why I'm not welcome in your kingdom. Because from where I'm standing, this is my kingdom."