For Just One More Day with You

16. Push and Pull

16. Push and Pull

"I didn't deserve what you did to me." Mitch's words cut through the air like shards of glass. Scott flinched.

Scott's eyes softened, and he nodded. "I know."

"I also know that you weren't thinking straight."

Scott looked down at the top of Bubba's head like it was the most interesting thing on the planet. He remained quiet.

"I also know that you almost died, like... a day later."

"Most of that is true..." Scott muttered.

"Then correct what isn't," Mitch replied.

"I was thinking just fine. And it was two days later."

Mitch could hardly make out what he was saying over the giant metaphorical wall that he was building. Damn, this man was stubborn.

"Did Derek say something to you?" Mitch asked, and Scott's eyes snapped upwards to meet his.

Bingo.

Then, the blue eyes filled with tears.

"I don't want to destroy you like that," Scott whispered, hugging Bubba tightly.

Mitch shifted closer, reaching up to pull Bubba away, gently. The dog complied, hopping down onto the floor and gazing up at them.

Scott eyed his dog like it was his lifeline, like Mitch had just stripped him naked.

Mitch reached for his hand, and found that it was trembling again. He wondered if Scott was scared, or if he wasn't feeling well.

But the fingers interlocked with his own, and he nearly sobbed at the small action.

"You did destroy me, Scott. Telling me you don't want me? That was..."

Scott clamped his eyes shut and Mitch paused as he squeezed his hand, pleadingly.

"Imagine that happening a few years down the line, Mitch... Imagine how it would be if we get more attached to one another, and you wake up and I'm gone. Or worse, you find me the way that he found her..."

"At least I'll know that you loved me. At least I'll know that I added something to your life. At least I'll know that, even for a short time, you made my life."

Scott stared at him in silence.

"I'm going to be destroyed, in one way or another. Can I at least choose the way that it's done?"

It was a harsh truth. They were going to suffer, even if Scott didn't succumb to this directly. But Mitch wanted to be there. He wanted to suffer through this together.

Being together made the pain worthwhile. It made it bearable.

Scott's tears spilled over and he shook his head. "I can't do this to you."

And Mitch thought that he might die, watching Scott struggle this way.

"Can you answer something for me? Honestly?"

Scott nodded, his lip quivering as he blinked back more tears.

"Do you love me?"

The blond was silent, lowering his gaze to stare at their clasped hands. Then, he nodded.

It was as though Mitch's head broke the surface after being underwater for weeks. He felt like he could breathe again.

"That's all that I need," Mitch whispered. "Look at me."