The Psycho Is Innocent | ꪜ

The Psycho Is Innocent

A R I E L

          ALL MY LIFE I've been pretty fearless. Whilst you scurried away at the sight of a harmless spider or cower at the thought of climbing onto the edge of a stable building, I took great pleasure in letting the wind flow through my hair as a rush of adrenaline rippled through my skin whenever faced with something you'd sooner die than experience. Fear, what is that? Such a word held no substance in my life and to this day I cannot accurately describe what it's like to feel fear. 

          But as I scampered against the rough soil beneath my feet, maneuvering around trees that hovered over my tiny frame as branches gripped my flesh and the air forced its way out of my lungs, I could confidently say for the first time in my life I've experienced fear, even if it were minuscule and could amount to a raindrop in a sea of water. 

        But not fear for my life. 

        Not fear for the others. 

        Not fear of the inevitable or a future that has yet to be written. 

        But fear of failure. 

        Because if I fail today and if I let all those weeks up on my feet scrambling like a headless chicken it would have all been for nothing. Feeling that ounce of fear and finally allowing myself to grasp such a basic human emotion would be sucked down the drain for absolutely no reason. If I fail today. . . if I allow what's left of my crumbling life to wither away, Tobias Aspen will never see the light of day. 

          And then, and only then should I start to fear the unknown.

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