Outro: Great, Now I'm In Love With The Assbutt

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"Oh, look, who might that stranger be?" Hwang Miri called out theatrically, "Doesn't she look awfully much like my long lost daughter?"

"No need to be so dramatic." Y/N puffed out gloomily.

Her mother pinched her cheek with a sugary smile, "Serves you right for neglecting your old mother like that."

"Oh, come on." She rolled her eyes.

"And hello Jungkook." Miri chirped delighted, "I'm so happy to hear that you managed to finally tame my gremlin child."

He lifted his hands in defense, not wanting to get on his girlfriend's bad side, "I didn't do anything Miss, she shouldn't need to change for my sake." - her satisfied expression told him that he chose the right words.

"You're putting up with her and still plan these awfully sweet things for her." The older woman clicked her tongue, signalizing them to follow her through the house.

"What things?" Y/N asked curiously, wide eyes searching for an answer in Jungkook's face.

"What do you mean? Don't I do a bunch of cute things for you, brat?"

"Brat?!" She echoed offended.

The big secret got revealed once Miri lead them into the back garden, where a small tent with pillows and fairy lights and all the other cheesy romantic props stood, "This is where you two lovebirds will be sleeping after dinner."

"You're kidding me." Y/N laughed, "I told you I'll kill you if it's anything cheesy."

"Hey, I wanted to find a nice midway between dinner-with-my-girlfriend's-mom and first date." Jungkook defended, though he knew that she liked it a lot more than she allowed herself to admit - at least if he was going by the intrigued spark in her eyes.

"I never see you two, and I simply wanted you to have some time to be together and for me to enjoy your company in the process. I won't butt into your evening, promise!" Miri explained, watching her daughter crawl into the tent with a very motherly smile, "Until you come inside to use the bathroom. Then it's a free for all if I get either of you in my clutches."

"I'd rather shit in a bush," Y/N deadpanned.

"As long as it's not my good Geraniums." Miri retorted, before clapping her hands together, "Before you two get to the nice part, please do endure dinner with this old lady first."


___


"Happy new year, son."





After dinner we were crowded together into the small space of the honestly ridiculous tent, while Jungkook was staring down at the message of his mother thoughtfully.

"And she didn't say anything else?" I leaned over his shoulder, following his fingers as they scrolled through the truthfully bland chat history between him and Shiro.

"I'm surprised she said anything at all after your little performance." He snorted, turning his head to look at me with a small, ironic smile.

I pulled my head back, "Ah yeah, forgot about that one." I shuffled in the little heap of pillows and blankets, "She must think I'm really weird, huh?"

"Wait till she finds out that you're making money by drawing me getting my dick sucked by other dudes."

"Let's try our best to not make this happen." Jungkook finding out had been bad enough already.

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