chapter 15 {no place like home}

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the next morning, Steve picked you up and you drove back to the avengers compound. you felt nervous, this was the first time you saw all the avengers again after what happened. the closer you came to the building, the more you felt this wasn't the best idea anymore. "I don't know if this is the best idea" you said to Steve. "it's going to be okay" Steve said to you grabbing your hand. 

"what if i change again" you said looking down

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"what if i change again" you said looking down. "I believe in you y/n, you can do this".

the car stopped, you looked at the building, you heart was beating fast. Steve got out of the car and grabbed your stuff before opening your door. "are you coming" he asked when you didn't move saying nothing. Steve put the stuff down and crouched next to the car, he grabbed you chin making you look at him. "listen y/n it's going to be okay, I'm with you" Steve said calming you down a little. he grabbed your hand and helped you out of the car and you walked hand in hand into the building.

everyone was waiting in the living room "y/n!" Natasha screamed running up to you and hugging you tightly, Wanda followed . "were so glad you're back, how are you" Wanda asked. "I'm alright" you answered smiling, happy that you saw your friends again, you just miss having them around. "hey kid" tony said walking up to you pulling you into an embrace. all the avengers welcomed you back until you only had to say hello to one more person; the winter soldier. he walked up to you. "I'm so sorry" was all you could say. "it's okay" he said smiling softly at you. "let's just start over" he said sticking his hand out "James Buchanan Barnes, but everyone calls me Bucky" he said waiting for you to shake his hand. it was weird hearing his real name, since you've always known him as the winter soldier. it would been nice to start over and get to know the real man behind the winter soldier. "y/n Stark" you said shaking his hand smiling back at him.

after you catch up with everyone you walked to your room. it felt great to be back, you've missed everyone more than you realized. you unpacked your stuff, when Tony walked in. "hey" he said standing in your doorway "can i come in". "of course come in" you said giving him a soft smile. he sat next to you on your bed. "are you okay" he asked. "yes i'm fine" you answered. Tony let out a loud breath, you knew he wanted to say something but he probably didn't know how to say it. "spit it out Tony" you said. "I uhhh" he said having trouble finding the right words. "I'm sorry" was all he could say. "sorry for what" you asked him. "for being a bad dad to you" he said. "you're not a bad dad" you said back to him "why would you say that". "I should have saved you before hydra could do all those horrible things to you" he said tears filling his eyes. "I should have known you were alive and i should have looked for you" he said now crying. "it isn't your fault, hydra is really good at making people disappear, you would have never found me, you probably didn't now they existed back than" you said to him.

even tho you always hoped your dad would come storming through the door when you were at hydra, you now needed to make sure he knew that there was nothing he could have done. "did you think of me, when you were there" he asked "sometimes" you answered honestly "did you hope i would come and save you" he asked, you swallowed back tears knowing an honest answer would break his heart. "I just hoped you would be safe and moved on with your life" you said lying to him. Tony looked at you "that isn't true, is it, tell me honestly i need to know even if the truth hurts" he said with an sad look in his eyes. "in the beginning i was hoping someone would come and save me" you said looking to the ground "but i soon didn't remember anything about my life before hydra and i began to lose hope anyone would ever find me if they were even looking" you said tears now running down your face as you thought back at the hopelessness you've felt. you looked over at Tony and could almost hear his heart break. you just gave him a big hug and he hugged you back, you just sat there hugging for a while. you finally felt like this man really was your dad, he cared about you and would rather hear the truth than a lie to make him feel better. you just felt how much he cared for you. you were interrupted by a female voice saying that Tony was needed in the lab. "did you give Jarvis a new voice" you asked him. "that's actually a long story, I tell you another time" he said "this was Friday, the new AI" he said standing up to go to the lab. "thanks dad" you said. Tony looked at you a glimmer in his eyes when you called him dad instead of Tony. you still felt a bit weird saying it but the look on his face was absolutely worth it. he just smiled at you and walked away.

you felt bored and decided to work out for a bit. you walked to the gym. no one was there so you could work out in silence. you started punching and kicking on the boxing back, when Steve and Bucky walked in ready to train. "nice form" Steve said. "thanks, I had a great teacher" you said back smiling at him. "I think i need something new tho, I think i mastered this one". "what makes you think you've mastered punching and kicking" Steve asked you. a grin spread across your face "because no one could stop me a month ago" you said. Steve than realized what you were talking about. "what to soon?" you asked. it was silent for a while when Bucky spoke. "well i can teach you something new" he said you looked curious at him. "what did you have in mind soldi- uhh Bucky" you said correcting his name. "sorry it's gonna take a while to get your name right" you said feeling guilty, because the name probably reminded him of his time at hydra. "it's okay, I understand" he said giving you a sweet smile. "I was thinking about knife throwing" he said. your eyes immediately shoot full of panic and you looked at Steve who had exactly the same look on his face. "did i say something wrong" Bucky asked. you thought about it for a moment, this was actually a great opportunity to get over your fear of knives. "yeah sure, why not, I can learn knife throwing, doesn't seem to hard" you said to Bucky "when do we begin". Steve gave you a worried look. "tomorrow?" Bucky asked "fine with me" you replied. "I'll leave your guys to train" you said walking away, leaving the boys to it.

you were ready to go to sleep when there was a knock on the door "come in" you said. Steve walked in, closing the door behind him. "hey handsome" you said smiling at him. he sat next to you in bed giving you a kiss before he started talking. "you sure about this knife throwing" he asked you worried. "well i actually think it can help me get over the fear" you said looking into Steve's worried eyes. "I have been cutting my own meat for a month now" you said proudly. "that's good, I'm proud of you for that" he said "but actual fighting with knives, it's a big step y/n". "I know Steve but i have to try, I'll be okay, so stop worrying so much" you said to him. "sorry, I just really care for you" Steve said looking deep into your eyes. "I care about you too" you said back "but i can take care of myself". "I know" Steve said hugging you. you both fell asleep in each other's arms.

you woke up by someone screaming. you slowly got out from under Steve's arms careful not to wake him up. you walked towards the screaming, it came out of Bucky's room. you opened the door and looked if he was okay. "NO DON'T HURT HER" he screamed. "no stop, hurt me instead, it was my fault" he screamed. you knew exactly what he was dreaming about. you walked up to him and tried to wake him up, shaking his shoulders. his eyes opened slowly as he stopped screaming. "hey, it's okay it's just a dream" you say softly to him. "y/n you're safe" he said almost whispering tears filling his eyes. "yes i'm safe" you say back. "I'm so sorry y/n" he said tears rolling down his face.

"it's okay, I'm safe now" you said hugging him tightly rubbing his back until you both fell asleep again

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"it's okay, I'm safe now" you said hugging him tightly rubbing his back until you both fell asleep again. not noticing Steve in the door opening watching you, seeing you fall asleep in his best friends arms.



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