Road Back to Love

Chapter 3

OLIVIA'S POV

I got worried after Hank's call knowing how Erin was adjusting to her new life in New York so I stopped over at NYFBI to bring her coffee when she didn't answer my call. As I was walking down the hallway trying to find office 12B, the vibe was incredibly cold and unwelcoming. If I felt that walking through the hall, I imagine how the working culture must be and why Erin is struggling. I see her sitting at her desk staring at the wall, zoned out and when I knock it makes her jump. 

"Hey, I brought you coffee! Thought it might brighten your day." All it took was one look into Erin's eyes and I knew she had slipped. I had to be careful or this could go the other way.

"Um, hey Liv. You should've called! I'm slammed with paperwork, we nailed this big case yesterday so I don't have much time to chat."

"No big deal, I just wanted to check in, last week was hard for you so is this week better?"

"Yeah, I mean it's kind of the same but I guess it's getting a little better."

"Erin, it sounds like you're trying to convince yourself. Voight is worried, says you haven't returned his calls and today you didn't pick up mine?"

"Listen Olivia, I'm fine. You and Hank need to back off, just because you're secretly dating and think I don't know about it doesn't mean you can act like my mother. I've already had a pretty shitty one, and another one who left me too early to figure out this world all for myself so I'm good with a third."

It was evident Erin was on something; drugs, alcohol, something that made her speak her mind. My heart sank hearing her thoughts, true or not, we have always had a solid relationship. "I would never try to take Camille's place in yours or Hank's life. I simply want to add on to your families happiness and vice versa. Lets not forget that you're the one who told Hank to go on the date with me, to call me, to come to New York. So you're entitled to your feelings about your mom and maybe you're afraid this will change something for you and your dad, but I'm here to tell you it won't be because of me." Erin looked at me with pink cheeks embarrassed for her outburst. 

"I also think your filter is a little loose because you chose a special type of coffee this morning?" I had a 50/50 shot but I'm a detective for a reason.

"What? No, I don't know what you're talking about." Her fingers tapped her travel mug and she became nervous.

"I'm not stupid. I brought you a coffee, but you're still drinking this mornings cold cup over the fresh one? Your pupils are also dilated. So is it vodka or baileys?"

Erin got tears in her eyes and started shaking her head. She got up to close the door, "I don't know how to do this Liv, I can't be here. Why is this my life? I really messed up this time." I sat there and hugged her for what felt like an hour. A few minutes later I grabbed her face and wiped her tears, "We're going to get you through this, but the drinking has to stop. I have an idea but you have to give me some time, ok?" Erin nodded her head. 

/

H- Voight

OB- Hank, it's worse than I thought. I thought she was only having a hard time settling with the FBI, they were giving her a hard time with training and policy type stuff. When you said she wasn't returning your calls that's when I tried calling too and she didn't answer. Long story short I stopped by her work and she was drunk, she put stuff in her coffee and I have a feeling its been going on for a little while. 

H- Damn it Erin!!

OB- She tried to push me away, even got mean about us dating and me taking the place of Camille. I had to talk her down, but I think I got through to her. 

H- Do I need to come up there? How bad is it?

OB- Honestly babe, I don't think she's going to listen to us. Her heart is hurting and she feels like she screwed up her life. I do need to go over there and clear out the alcohol.

H- Hmm ok, let me think on it. I swear if she gets into the drug scene I'm on the next plane and she's not gonna like it, you make sure you tell her that since she doesn't know how to pick up a phone 

/

JAY'S POV

These days I ran on coffee and beer, except I wasn't getting blackout in my living room anymore, I now went to an off the grid bar and drank alone after work. I grabbed a Henley from the dresser and a clean pair of socks when I saw the ring. I sat down on the bed starring at my mothers ring thinking how badly I wished it was on Erin's finger; how if I ever got another opportunity I would never screw it up. I shut the box and secured it safely between my boxers and socks then left for work. It felt weird driving everywhere, almost unnatural, I got used to the passenger seat but I would never say that out loud. 

"Mornin' Trudy.." I got half way up the stairs to the palm scanner when I was summoned back to her highness

"Halstead! I need you. Sign here for your time off" She had no patience this morning but I had no idea what this was for.

"Excuse me? I didn't request time off." I didn't want to be difficult but needed more information

"Well you're getting it, so just sign." She nearly signed for me and I headed up to the bullpen

Everyone must of been out on an assignment so I set my things down and got some coffee. I settled in on yesterday's paperwork when Hailey walked in and started making small talk.  "Jay, my office." Hank stood in his doorway with his arms crossed. He called me Jay, so this is either a personal or serious conversation. Either way it probably isn't good.

"So you were right about Erin. I haven't spoken to her but Olivia has and it seems like she's drinking at work."

"Oh wow. I knew my gut was telling me something but I didn't want to be right, sir."

"Jay, cut it out, it's Hank right now. I tried to help her last time and it got worse. You're the one who pulled her out of it, are you willing to do that again?" Hank sat at the edge of his desk waiting for an answer that took me several minutes to spit out.

"Hank, she doesn't want to see me. She left me, she won't talk to me. What makes you think I won't make it worse too?" I dropped my head, sighing at the memories.

"Olivia says that she's miserable without you. She says she "hates NY and messed up her life." I think she didn't answer you because she had already started drinking and well, you know how drugs and alcohol make Erin avoid people." Hank tried convincing me.

I didn't really have to think about it considering how much danger Erin could get herself into. "I'll go."

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