Desire: One Woman's Story of Love

Chapter Thirty

Reader's POV:

I wasn't sure how much time had passed as I sat in Lana's office watching her pace the vicinity of the room. She hadn't spoken a single word since I told her who raped me. I couldn't tell what she was thinking, but I noticed her hands clench into bunched fists at either side of her.

"Chris.." she mumbled, breaking the silence voice getting lost in the back of her throat. My ears quickly stood too attention as I glanced at her, unsure whether to speak or not, but then she spoke again. "I'm going to fucking kill him." Her voice was low, full of anger and hatred; emotions I'd never encountered from Lana before.

She turned, heading for the door, and panic set in. I quickly stood from the sofa, moving swiftly to stand in front of the door, preventing her from leaving. I locked my hands gently around her arms. "Please.. don't." I begged.

"He will not get away with this." She growled. "Move.. please." She added, trying and failing to sound calm. Her whole body was trembling with rage but I couldn't let her confront him. Lana didn't have a violent bone in her body but I believed her when she said she was going to kill him and as much as I wanted him to pay for what he'd done, I couldn't let her do that. I couldn't loose Lana.

I shook my head slowly, refusing to let her leave, silently pleading her as my eyes bored into hers. "Please.. just leave it." I whispered, stepping closer to her, my hands finding hers and offering her a reassuring squeeze.

"Just leave it? That man raped you!" She shook her head in disbelief and I could see tears glistening in her dark eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?" She suddenly asked, catching me off guard.

I averted my gaze, shrugging my shoulders. "I thought it'd be easier that way.. if you didn't know."

"Easier for who?" She asked, her voice soft. I shrugged my shoulders again, lifting my gaze to meet hers, fresh tears running down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry." I whispered. "I should have told you.. but I didn't want you doing something stupid."

Her features softened, the tension in her shoulders dissipating as she slightly relaxed her posture. Hands squeezing mine, she tugged me closer, her arms wrapping around my shoulders, holding me close. I wrapped my arms tightly around her waist, inhaling the sweet smell of her perfume; my favourite. The smell that made me feel safe and content. The smell that told me everything was going to be ok.

"You should have told me." She whispered, the tone in her voice holding a sliver of hurt.

I wiped away my tears with the back of my hand. "I know." I sighed, lifting my head up to look at her. There was a gentle smile on her face, but her eyes looked sad. "Please don't do anything stupid." I pleaded.

There was a couple seconds of silence as she regarded me, thinking for a moment before she gave into my plea; "Fine, I won't do anything stupid."

"Promise?"

"I promise.. but only if we go to the police."

I didn't answer for a moment, I really didn't want to go to the police. I just wanted to forget, but that was proven impossible now that I was carrying a constant reminder; his baby.

"Either the police deal with him.. or I do." She said, giving me an ultimatum. I didn't blame her, but I couldn't lose her and I knew if she got her hands on Chris, it wouldn't end well. Look at what happened with Oliver Thredson. Of course Lana had every right to do that, I wish I was brave enough to confront my attacker like she had. Given the chance Lana would for sure kill Chris. If I were in her shoes, I'd do the same; not caring about the consequences that were to follow. Lana going to prison, would kill me.