JUST IN TIME (Author's Reco)

THE START

JENNIE

           
We have been together most of the time. Sometimes I sleep at her apartment and sometimes she does too in my place. She plays me a song on her guitar. She draws me digitally using the new sketching tablet I bought for her. God. I don't know why I have been spoiling Lisa with things and my love lately. But she's more enjoying the love than the material things. She would even give me a foot massage and me too I give her favorite grips on her back especially when she's really tired.

           
She never let me wash the dishes and just do it herself. But she would always request for me to cook. She's actually gaining some weight. And I love it every time she appreciates my food. Rosé and Jisoo were even surprised to see that Lisa and I's actions are just like how we were before. Lisa never entertained other girls anymore. She even deactivated the app she used to get some women before for a one night stand. She doesn't go to the clubs anymore. Not even drinking. All she does is take care of me and take me out on dates. Ah!  Why am I blushing telling you all of these?

           
We make love anytime we want. It's different. It's more beautiful and heartfelt now.  She makes me crave for her touch. I love the way she makes me feel complete when she's inside me. Her kisses became more passionate. Sometimes wild and sweet and I love it!

           
She would give me flowers almost everyday. She would write love letters for me.
And I love reading those over and over again and she would catch me blushing in the room. I would hide it but she tickles me until she finds out. I actually have eight love letters from her including the one she wrote on our nineteenth birthday.  She doesn't know it's with me because she never looked for it anymore when she woke up that morning.

           
She becomes sexier every time we have sex. She always asks me what I want and she generously give it to me more than what I wanted.

           
We actually became very adventurous with our sex life. There's really something in her that I am wanting her more and more. But of course, my favorite would always be when she pumps me from behind, owning my pussy just all for herself while she clutches my boobs and spoils me with her tender kisses. Those kisses that I know she's the only one who can give me.

           
Sex on the countertop of my apartment's kitchen is also good. The thrusting adventure in her balcony is also something that gives us fun too. Oh, Lisa! I want you everyday.

           
December is coming and I have to talk to her about where we'll spend Christmas. We used to spend time with my family in Seoul. Now, I actually want to ask her if she'd like us to spend it with her family. But I guess, I know the answer and she won't like that idea.

           
Few months from now will be our graduation day and we have been trying to finish all school work. Stress here and there. I easily get tired lately so Lisa would force me to stop doing my school stuff and she's the one finishing it for me. One fine sunny day, I'm waiting for Rosé's message because Jisoo wants to have lunch with us and that they will pick me up in a while. Lisa couldn't come with us because Jackson visited Busan again with Sheri and Lisa had to be with them at the province where Sheri's family lives. They are also looking forward to see me so we set tomorrow night as our bonding time. As I am having lunch with Rosé and Jisoo, I wanted to tell them something. Because I felt something unusual with my body lately. My breasts are swollen sometimes. I even let Lisa check it from time to time if it's in best shape before we go to sleep. Ugh. Of course, she would always say how beautiful my boobs are because in her eyes, I am the only prettiest view.

"Girl, are you okay? Why are you so pale?"Rosé noticed.

"I'm fine. I just-- maybe i just ate something bad."I said. My forehead is already sweating and I felt a little bit tired.

           
I excused myself and went to the bathroom. Not only once. Not only twice, but thrice.

"Are you noticing something in your body lately?"Jisoo asked.

           
I told them everything. They're both pre-med students, so yeah, maybe they can help me figure out. I opened my bag to check on my phone. I got messages from Lisa asking how I am and she told me her activities. I responded to her and told her that I miss her so much already. She's been away for two nights now. I fixed my things and found my emergency sanitary pad is still in my bag.

"Fuck. I didn't have my period last month."I told Jisoo and Rosé and they looked at me.

           
They're smiling. I am so nervous. Shit. Shit. Shit. How come we didn't realize we're not using protection anymore?

           
Jen, you're the one who refuses every time Lisa wants to put on the rubber because you want to feel all of her. Jennie, you're dead!

           
Jisoo brought us to the pharmacy and she's the one who bought the pregnancy test kit.  Why are these two keep smiling?! Gosh!

           
We went to a restaurant owned by one of Jisoo's friend and she let me use the comfort room. She instructed me how to use it before I got in. I waited for the result before I went back to them. As soon as I entered the car, I showed them the small white device with two red lines. Actually the other is light. So Jisoo wanted to be sure even if she is confident and they brought me to the hospital.

           
Same result with my serum test. I'm pregnant. I am having mixed emotions. I told them not to tell Lisa yet. I'll be the one to tell her on Christmas eve as my gift to her. Wait. I don't even know what her reaction will be. Will it be fine with her?

           
Another night came and Lisa picked me up from my apartment. She missed me so much and we almost ended in bed for kissing me non stop. We couldn't do it because Jackson and Sheri are waiting outside for us.

           
While at the restaurant, a baby girl maybe two years old is playing around and would even smile at Lisa. Lisa is so fond of her that she would carry her on her lap while her parents are enjoying watching us talking to their baby. She's so cute!

"Hmmm. Practicing, huh? Jennie? Lisa? Hmmm?"Jackson teased us.

"Oh God. If ever you two will have kids, can you please allow them to be with us even just for a whole week? I can already imagine how good looking they will be with cuteness! I think, I'm spoiling them with everything theywant!Jennie, Lisa, hmmm?"Sheri added and Lisa kept smiling and then she looked at me.

"I would always want to have a family with Jennie.Promise Jen, if ever we'll have kids, I will love you and them forever unconditionally. I will be a good provider. I will make you all happy in life. I want a baby boy for our first. But whatever God gives, I will love my child with all my heart. With all of me. And I love you forever."She said with teary eyes and there I proved that she will be okay with my pregnancy. Oh, Lisa! My heart is melting. There's no doubt that Lisa will be the best parent she can be for our baby.

But how about me?

           
The demons in me are turning into doubts again. Will I be ready? God. What do I really want? Why can't I make up my mind? Why am I so fucking scared? I am so scared of what lies ahead.