Song 2 You

Chp. 1: Splitting Up

"10"

Please don't do this to me.

"9"

I don't know what I'll do.

"8"

You have to stay.

"7"

Tell me this is a nightmare.

"6"

Come to me and we'll be okay again.

"5"

Just come to me and I'll be okay again.

"4"

I can't be okay without you.

"3"

Come...

"2"

Back..

"1"

Please.

.............

If I learned anything from tonight's events, it's to not let anyone in. Even if you think you can trust them, they'll take your trust, chew it up, and spit it to the curb. They'll take the love that you have and use it for themselves, without caring about what it will cost for you. If you let them in, they will only tear you down.

I tell myself this as I drag the blade across my arm. One here, one there. Just a couple to join the old ones that were there from previous damaging nights. I watch with a blank expression as the silver ridges glide through my skin like butter, easing away the pain of the break up that occured just an hour ago.

I still haven't wrapped my head around the fact that Beck had left me outside. He knew I struggled with depression. He knew I was close to ending myself.
He knew that he was the only one that convinced me to stop. Until tonight, of course.

I was two months clean, which was a long time for me. He was proud. We were going to celebrate at Nozu, with just the two of us. It was going to be a happy night. He ruined it.

I hadn't realized how many cuts I have made until I pulled myself out of my thoughts. I only meant to put three or four, but my distracted mind left seven scattered around my forearms. Quickly, I cleaned up the accidental large amount of blood that dripped from my arms.

"Shit."

There was too much, much more than intended. As I tried to clean my wounds from one arm, more blood would come from the other, and vise versa. I managed to stop the bleeding, thankfully, and I headed to my room to go to sleep. It was only 7:30, but I've had enough of today.

I passed out on the way to my bed.

.............

Beck POV

"10"

Oh please.

"9"

Here she goes.

"8"

Counting down until her problems go away.

"7"

Typical Jade.

"6"

Why is she doing this?

"5"

Does she really want to break up?

"4"

I don't want her to leave me.

"3"

But I can't stand the fighting.

"2"

I want a normal relationship... But I want Jade too.

"1"

I can't have both.

.............

Not opening the door was maybe the dumbest thing I've ever done. However, I know what I'm doing. Jade and I need to space ourselves and mature before we can have a healthy relationship. The fighting was too much for both of us.

Then I remembered. Jade's "two months clean" celebration was this weekend.

"Shit."

Eh. I'm sure she'll be fine. She made it this far, and I know she's stronger than her depression. She can handle it.

I still love her. I probably always will. I don't want to go through life without her, and I know I won't. We'll get back together, just not now. We need to heal.

I'm positive she'll be okay. I know Jade. She won't let anything overcome her pride.

She didn't come to school for the next week.

.............

Jade POV

I woke up on the floor of my bedroom, where I last remember being. Living by myself has it's perks, but sometimes I wish I lived with a normal functioning family with a normal functioning life. My parents divorced a couple of months ago, causing them to fight over who would have to take me. I couldn't stand the fact that they both didn't want me, so I left the next day. I got myself an apartment and had Beck there to keep me company. But not anymore I guess.

I got up from the ground and looked at myself in the mirror. Man do I look horrendous. I look super pale (paler than usual) and had deep blue bags under my eyes.

How long was I out for?

I took a shower, got myself dressed, put on some makeup, and got some breakfast. Wait no. No breakfast. I'm not hungry enough for that. But I am hungry enough for coffee. I'm always hungry enough for coffee.

As I drank my warm drink, I remembered what happened the night before. This realization hit me in the back of the head with full force that I wasn't prepared for.

Jade West isn't one to cry, but this is a rare occasion that I will allow myself to do so. So, I cried. I cried for hours.

I didn't go to school for the next week.

.............

Hey guys!

Welcome to my new story! I hope you join me on this journey and enjoy my first full book.

Later Haters 💜