epiphany || bucky barnes

𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

DECEMBER, 1987.

"Don't hit me in the face."

"I won't."

I aimed the staff at the soldier's right shoulder. I moved my arm just slightly so my aim was adjusted to the concrete wall behind him. I pressed a button on the grip, before hurling it at him. The staff extended from its titanium state, two long, silver blades now protruding from either side. The soldier moved his head to the side slightly as the silver blade punctured the concrete, making bits and pieces of it fall to the ground.

"You have a strong arm," he complimented, "though not strong enough."

I rolled my eyes at his snide remark, "Don't start comparing me to your metal arm."

"Come on, hit me. I wanna see how hard you can." He whispered, holding his fists up in front of his face. "Please."

"Please? Are you asking for pain again?"

"No. I just want to know how weak you are for when I give my reports."

I cracked my neck, raising my fists in the air as I glared at him. "Fine."

I stared into his eyes for a moment before throwing a right cross into his jaw, swinging through as I did so. The soldier's eyes widened in surprise as he stumbled back.

"Hard hit." He breathed out, a chuckle escaping his lips.

"Now you realize." I commented, lunging at him with my knee straight into his gut.

He coughed, holding his stomach before grabbing me by the hair, throwing me against the concrete wall beside my staff. "I suggest you stand down now."

I rubbed my head, more pain in my scalp than anywhere else. "Be careful with the hair, it took years to grow it out."

His eyes grew dark at those words. "You usually aren't supposed to talk this much in a fight."

I got to my feet, brushing my uniform off. "I'm allowed to do whatever I please. Plus, I know you have a soft spot for me."

His brows furrowed in confusion at those words. "A soft spot? Never heard of it."

I rose a brow at his confusion, "Remember my first solo mission? When we kissed on the rooftop? "

"Of course I remember." He sighed.

"I was so afraid I would forget from the brain zapping...I'm glad I didn't."

"That's why I keep a notebook and write every thing down in it, helps to keep events in order."

"Oh so you wrote our little interaction down in your secret little notebook? You're telling me didn't feel anything?" I smirked.

"Of course I felt something. It was my dick getting hard for you."

My cheeks blushed at those words before I shook my head, "You- No! That's not what I meant! I mean, did you feel anything? Like... love or attraction."

"Love? Did you just say love? That doesn't exist here, HYDRA taught me that. We... we can't really be anything more than just partners. We'd be separated, heartbroken, and then punished. A vicious cycle. It would be naive of you to believe you would be anything more then a quick fuck to me." He responded as if he was preparing to say that to me.

I looked down at that. I guess I didn't fully grasp the idea that I was only here to impress my father, no one else. That there wasn't room for my "selfish" needs. "Sorry, you're right. I should've known."

I reached up and grabbed the base of the staff, pressing the button on the grip and retracting the blades. My eyes flickered up to meet his gaze again as the shine of the titanium reflected the single light illuminating the room. The room hung in heavy, undeniable silence.