Fragile

Chapter 16

I obeyed, zooming in on a group of guys guiding the main boat. They seemed vaguely familiar. "Who are those guys?" 

"Look at their uniforms." 

I zoomed in and immediately my stomach dropped. "Lacrosse team." 

Why were they here at almost 1am? Why were they flagging a boat? What were they trying to get on that boat? Part of me already knew the answer. Maybe I played stupid because I hoped it wasn't true, but when the ramp hit the dock and the 'cargo' was guided out, I suddenly was grateful I didn't have any food in my stomach. 

A total of five girls were bound together by rope like prisoners. They stumbled in a line out, being grabbed by the awaiting lacrosse guys. They looked dirty, malnourished. As if they had been on that boat for months. A black van pulled up, the slide opening to guide them in. It was such a quick, wordless transaction. Part of me expected there to be other drug dealings or action on the side, like in the movies. But there wasn't. It was so discreet, the dock so secluded, it almost seemed unreal. 

"W-where are they taking them?" I stammered, pulling down the binoculars. "We have to stop them! Why are we still here, we need to-" 

Noah caught my arm. "We can't do anything right now. We don't have the manpower-" 

"How could you say that?" I demanded. "Those girls are being trafficked. Right in front of us! You want me to just watch and do nothing? Are you out of your goddamn mind-" 

"Fay, look at me." 

"We can't just-" 

"Fay," Noah spoke sternly, cupping my cheek so I had to look at him. "There's nothing we can do. Not right now." 

"How many times do these girls have to be trafficked before it's the right time?" Tears freely flowed down my cheeks, and for once, I didn't feel guilty for crying. The pain, the torture those girls were going through, it warranted more than just tears. 

"I didn't want you to have to see this," he admitted. "But I needed you to understand how serious-" 

I jerked away from him. "You're just as bad as them," I seethed. "They are right there, you could stop them!" 

"You think it doesn't kill me to sit here?" he demanded. "You think it doesn't take everything in me not to kill those fuckers every day I see them at your school?" 

"So what? You're the victim here?"

"If I ran down there and rescued those girls, sure I would save all five, if I'm lucky," he explained bitterly. "But my cover would be blown. And all the other girls we haven't been able to locate? We may never be able to find them. They would relocate their operation and all the leads we have so far would be gone." 

I bit my lip, salty tears stinging their chapped cracks. I didn't want to admit he was right. Watching those girls being taken felt so wrong, all of it was so wrong. 

"We don't know where they are keeping the other girls, or how many they have. We don't know the true leader of the operation. There are so many things we just don't know," he continued. "I hate myself for not being able to just shoot those fuckers dead right now. But I can't do that without risking the lives of the girls we have yet to find." 

"Who's 'we'?" I sniffled. "I thought you were working on this case alone." 

"Not exactly. I don't work with the government," he said. "I collaborate with some detectives in the area, and a few other freelancers. Right now, we have someone tailing that van. Hopefully they will be lead to a warehouse and we can find where they run everything." 

"Who is tailing? Why aren't we helping?" the questions stumbled so fast. 

"Our attempts at tailing so far have been futile. It's also agreed that keeping my identity secret is absolutely essential, even if they were to raid their operation. Keeping me out of sight will help locate future operations in case they try to start up again after we catch the main leader," he explained. "Of course, after saving you I've managed to catch their attention. We are working on getting another agent in the field, but until then, I have to make sure my cover isn't blown. No matter what." 

"Maybe you shouldn't have saved me then," I mumbled. 

"I don't regret saving you," he spoke firmly. "I know it doesn't look like it, but there is a group of us that came together to take these assholes down. Despite barely knowing each other, we are all determined to save those girls and kill the operation. Even if I fall, there will be another person to take my place." 

"That doesn't make me feel better," I said. "What if your cover is blown because of me, and you get hurt?" 

"I signed up for this knowing the risks." 

"Well I never signed up to be responsible for your death either," I snapped. 

He leaned over and rubbed my arms gently. "You're shaking," he whispered, pausing to wipe my tear stained face. 

I looked down at my lap, which was turned awkwardly to face him. "Why do you always do this?" 

"Do what?" 

"You drop a huge bomb of information and just... why do you have to be so gentle?" I blurted. "I can't even be angry with you right now." 

He tried to squash a smile, failing. "Do you want to be angry with me?" 

"Of course," I grumbled. "You're so secretive and this whole situation feels like it came out of a mafia movie and I still don't even know the full story. I don't know what to believe or who to trust and I just hate that the world is just as shitty as-" As my mother said. 

"As what?" he coaxed softly. 

I shook my head. "Why is it every time you reveal something to me, I feel like I know you even less?" 

"I'm sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have approached you. You wouldn't be caught in this." 

Strangely, even though I hated the entire situation, and I wanted to cry at how awful everything was, I didn't regret it. As hurt and heartbroken as I felt, as morally destroyed as my heart and mind were, I didn't regret meeting Noah. I didn't regret learning about the lacrosse team, and as painful as tonight was, I didn't regret seeing what I saw. Because for the first time in my life, I suddenly felt like I had a purpose. 

I took Noah's hand. "I want in. All in."