His Chanda | Star-crossed Lovers

Ch-14 I'll wait for you

Chandni was sitting in the garden of Angraj's bungalow. Greenery always made her forget her worries, but that day it wasn't helping her either. Doesn't matter how hard she tried to stop thinking about Angraj, she couldn't.

"May I sit beside you?"

She turned to look at the source of the voice and found Sahib standing at a distance.

She nodded and he sat on the grass beside her.

"So you are thinking about Angraj?"

She nodded.

"Are you angry?"

She shook her head.

"Scared?"

She again shook her head.

"Then out of love with him?"

She instantly shook her head.

"Means you still love him?"

She nodded.

"Then what's with so much thinking? You love him. That's all what should matter to you and him."

"It's not all about love."

"Then?"

"His life isn't normal. He isn't the same Angraj I knew. He has hardened himself. I have no problem with him. I have doubt on myself. It's not what I wanted. I never wished for love. I always wished for life of a normal girl. Now when I can have that life, I fell for him. I love him but...... I don't know what is stopping me. I don't know." She began crying.

"You are not ready to spend your whole life with a person who has killed someone. This is what's stopping you. You want him, but not what he has became now. You only want his good side, not the dark one."

"I don't know!"

"You need to share your feelings with him. Maybe then you realise what you exactly want."

Sahib stood up and left.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Sahib was right.

She loved Angraj but couldn't accept that he has this side as well.

She needed to confess her feelings and fears to him.

She entered in his room after a knock. Angraj looked at her clueless. He stood up from the armchair and she moved closer to him. The very next moment she embraced him affectionately. Angraj took a deep breathe of relief.

She didn't judge him.

"Ang, I need time." She spoke while putting her head in the crook of his neck.

"I understand. I'll wait for you." He caressed her back.

"And what if I never came back?"

"I'll still wait for you and live in a hope that one day you'll accept me as what I really am." His tone was confident, he meant his words.

She looked into his eyes and smiled with love shining in her orbs. He kissed her forehead.

"I'll wait for you till eternity."

That was what she needed. Assurance that if she couldn't live without him, he will welcome her to his life again.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Sometimes love isn't enough to live with someone. Someone with a dark past.

Chandni was confused. This fear of her couldn't be described by any term. She was conflicted between her heart and soul. Her heart wanted Angraj, even if he has done deadliest deeds. But her soul wanted his pure side. She couldn't ignore that he has committed a crime and he will commit many crimes in future as well. It was burdening her soul.

She wanted to end this conflict. She wanted to be enough strong to stand by his side. She wanted to accept his dark side as well. But she needed time for that. This drastic turn had blocked her senses to differentiate between right and wrong.

She needed time to understand what exactly she wanted.

Angraj was doing the right thing but in a wrong way, because if he chose the right path he will never ever be able to end those social monsters. Sometimes laws need to broken to bring justice.

But it will effect him as well. Chandni was afraid of that effect. He will change, not into any negative personality, but into a personality surrounded by negativity.

She feared this change. And she needed to know if she could prevent it.

She loved him.
But she doubted if her love could keep alive his compassion.

If she wanted to keep him the same, she needed to change herself. She wanted to become his moonlight which could show him the right path in the darkness.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
My philosophical mode is on again.

Describing Chandni's fears wasn't an easy task. I myself didn't know what was stopping her. I only knew that accepting someone like Angraj would be difficult.

So I hope this chapter made some sense. I tried my best to justify Chandni's view. Rest is upon you all.

I succeeded or not?