"What's up with jemily"

And Always

So umm yea I finally updated this...I'm sorry grab tissues.

TW: mention of ED/starvation and self harm.

EMILY'S POV:

I awoke to the blinding, hot lights of the all too familiar hospital room, while feeling the cotton covered metal and plastic bed beneath.

I heard a low raspy voice from the other side of the room.

"Em?" JJ called out. I knew her candy sweet voice anywhere.

"I-I'm sorry did I wake you?" I asked guiltily.

"Emily Prentiss I can't believe you, you are literally the one in the hospital bed and YOU'RE apologizing?" She asked shaking her head.

"What even happened?"

"Well Lily said her first word, which was mama...and then you...fainted." She sighed.

"Oh god I'm an idiot." I said putting my head in my hands.

"No you're not Em, why would you even say something like that?" JJ asked worriedly.

"JJ...I'm not okay...a-and I'm afraid my mental state will hurt Lily and Henry, and even you." I said looking up at her with tears in my eyes.

"Well we c-can get you help, I need you Emily, Lily and Henry need you the team needs you. If it takes going to a therapist then-"

"No JJ...I need a mental hospital...that isn't the first time I've had a dream like that." I said hanging my head.

"Emily, why didn't you tell me I could've-I could've tried to help you."

"It wouldn't have made a difference." I said crying now. "I guess I can't compartmentalize as well as I thought." I said chucking as I wiped my tears away.

"H-How long do you think you'll be in the hospital?" JJ asked.

"I don't know it depends on however long my physiatrist thinks is best."

"Okay Emily I just-I have one question and I want you to be completely honest with me." JJ said.

"Shoot." I replied.

"H-Have you been umm...starving yourself?" She asked her voice breaking before completing a full sentence.

"N-No."

"Don't lie to me Emily!" JJ lightly shouted. "The doctors told me you were malnourished to high extremes which..is why you fainted actually." JJ said disappointed.

"I-I think it would be best that as soon as I got out of here, I got to the mental facility. Hopefully I can get some help there." I said back faintly.

"Should we tell the team?" JJ asked.

"Just Hotch for now please, I don't want the others worrying." I said back in a defeated tone.

"As you wish." She said getting up to leave.

I didn't stop her I just couldn't. Something inside of me was telling me that this was the best choice, I mean if I didn't bad things could happen. Right?

One thing is most certainly clear. After the many times I've been kidnapped, tortured, etc. it's going to be a while before I leave this facility.

But do I have the heart to tell JJ that.

I'd be leaving her.

Alone.

With 2 kids.

A single mother.

And I'm too weak and pathetic to do anything about it.