Chapter 1

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Chapter 1

"Grey, ride with Karev. He's on a baby run." Arizona yelled when she and Karev ran through the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital

"I.. I can't, I need to speak to Derek!" Meredith said, trying to get away with it. She needed to talk to her husband about the news she just recieved about her daughter.

"Well, newborn life hanging in the balance. Make it fast." Arizona replied

Meredith let out a big sigh and ran down the hall to get changed into her scrubs. Meanwhile she paged Derek.

When Meredith finally got changed, Derek walked in.

"What's the matter?"

"We lost Zola"

"Meredith, what do you mean, we lost Zola?"

"Janet just called, she told me we should move on"

"Mer, when did she call?"

"30 minutes ago.. Derek.. Zola is gone, our baby is gone" Meredith said as she walked out of the room and walked to the ambulance bay, grabbing the bags she needed to take with her

"Let me help" Derek said as he kept following her

"They don't think I should be Zola's Mother" Meredith said as she finally reached the ambulance bay while some paramedics were loading in all the stuff.

"Meredith, it's gonna be okay"

"Okay? Derek, Zola was our baby.. and now she's gone.. I don't want another baby" Meredith said, tearing up.

Derek pulled her into a hug and held her close for a minute before he let her go. She stepped into the ambulance with Alex to go get that newborn baby.

Derek looked at a defeated Meredith. She hated being vulnerable but she couldn't change how she felt. They lost their little baby and Meredith was blaming herself.

"I'm sorry." Alex said as the ambulance drove over bumpy roads.

"It's fine."

"It's not fine. This is all my fault. Why not try adoption again?" Alex asked. "Social services just took our kids away. What do you think, we wait a week and they'll forget and give us another try with a new kid?" Meredith asked.

"Okay, so get a surrogate."

"Alex." Meredith said with a sigh. "Why not?" He asked. "Because I don't want a surrogate, okay? Just drop it ." She replied. "It's my fault." Alex said. "No...it's my fault. I tampered with the trial. Not you. You did the right thing, even though it was dirty." She replied.

"Whatever. You're not a quitter, that's not who you are." Alex said. "Alex-". The ambulance suddenly lurched forward, and Alex and Meredith both grabbed on to the baby's incubator. Meredith hit her head on the cabinets above, getting a minor laceration.

"Did we just get hit?" Alex asked. "I-I think so." Meredith replied in shock. "You okay?" Alex asked. "Yeah." Meredith replied rubbing her head

"You're bleeding." Alex pointed out. "I'm fine, Alex."

The paramedic came around the back and opened the two doors, revealing the very busy highway and slick roads. "You guys okay?" He asked.

"We're good. Who hit us?" Alex replied. "Not sure. They drove off. How's the patient?" The paramedic asked. "She's just fine." Meredith responded. "Okay. Looks like our tire blew somehow. I called triple a, but we're gonna have to stay here for a while."

"How long?" Meredith asked. "I'm guessing about an hour. I put traffic cones around the truck, but be careful and I suggest getting out. If we get hit there's a high chance the rig will explode." He warned. "We can't! The baby will freeze." Meredith exclaimed.

"Listen, I'm gonna try to flag someone down a little further up. Don't do anything stupid." The paramedic said as he walked away. "I'll call Derek." Meredith said. "We can't get out. The baby will freeze." "I know. Just a few minutes. We'll figure something out." She replied.

"Meredith?" Derek's voice filled the air.

"Hey Derek. Listen, we're stuck on the highway."

"What? Why? What happened?" He asked in concern.

"We have a flat tire. Can you send another ambulance out or something? We need to get the baby to the hospital." She asked.

"Yes. Are you okay?" He replied in concern.

"We're fine. Just hurry." Meredith said.

"Okay. I love you." Derek replied.

"Love you too." She said as she hung up the phone.

"They're sending another rig. Hopefully it'll be only a few minutes." Meredith said as she grabbed the tiny bundle into her arms. "Hey princess, you're going to be all better soon, okay? Life is so rough right now but you'll be okay." Meredith murmured to the baby.

Alex watched the interaction and his guilt levels rose. He knew Meredith would be an amazing mother, and he ruined it for her. "I'm so sorry Mer." He said, voice dripping with emotion. "I never meant to take her away." He whispered.

"I know Alex. We'll be fine, okay?" Meredith asked. Alex just nodded. The guilt was eating at him. "Please don't feel guilty. This was my doing. Me. Not you, okay evil spawn?" Meredith asked sternly. "Okay." He said, not believing her at all.

"I'll call Janet. I'll- I'll talk to her." He said pleadingly. "Alex! Enough. It's over. Derek and I...we'll make it work somehow. Maybe we just weren't meant to have kids. I don't know. It'll be fine." Meredith said, her voice raising. "You can't just give up!" Alex yelled.

"Alex, I can't do the one thing my body was made to do. I ruined our adoption. That's a sign I shouldn't be a mother. I have no fight left in me." Meredith said in defeat. "You're not giving up. You are going to be an excellent mother one day Mer. And I'll be the cool uncle." Alex said.

Meredith chuckled at that. "Hopefully." She whispered. "I know-" Alex started.

That's when it happened. The ambulance was hit from behind, sending the ambulance down the ditch as they were off to the side of the road. Meredith somehow managed to get the baby back into the incubator before the lurch sent her flying towards Alex.

She hit her back, very hard against the wall as the ambulance crashed on its side. And that's when everything went black.





Hey guys! We hope you enjoyed this chapter. Go follow @_Ktje_ , this is a collaboration with her and she's an excellent writer. Hope you guys are all doing well!  

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