Memory Documentation

chapter nineteen | documenting a blissful night with him

"C'mon, Darce. You know why. You know I'd..." He stopped, hesitating. A moment of silence passed before he finally said, "I'd do anything. For you."

I bit my lip. Gripped the edge of the pool. Clenched my toes under the water.

The physical, emotional, and mental pull I felt towards him was too damn much sometimes, especially when he said things like this. I had to take a deep breath before I could get my next words out.

"Same here."

The utter lameness of my words slugged me so hard in the chest that I physically coughed to alleviate the pressure. Stupid! That's all you got?

"I-I mean –" I whirled to face him "– well, that is what I mean. B-but like..." I could've said it better than that!

My words halted at his soft, half-smile. There was fondness in his eyes that I couldn't deny. And God, do I see that look more and more often.

I opened my mouth, and different words tumbled out of them this time. "I want to be there for you, too. No matter what you need. No matter what you're going through. I'm there, Chris."

While those choice of words better expressed how I felt, it didn't make them any less embarrassing to say. I dipped my fingers into the pool and brought them to my cheeks with a light slap.

Chris laughed aloud, the sweet sound of it ringing into the night. It was better than any melody that'd come from the concert stage today.

He leaned and nudged me with his shoulder. "I know you do, Darce. We're in this together."

Together, huh?

I twirled my braid around my fingers, quickly sorting through the pros and cons about what I wanted to say. Would he get mad? Will he even tell me?

"Then..." I started, deciding to go for it. "Will you tell me why you've been so angry at your phone today?"

The carefree expression on his face froze over. The smile was there, but the flame blew out. I stammered to say, "I'm not going to force you to tell me. It's just that every time you looked at your phone today, you've gotten really upset. And you've avoided it all together."

He looked ahead, a grim frown tugging down at the corner of his lips. The silence that stretched between us went on for so long that I was terrified he was angry with me.

Just as I opened my mouth to speak, he did first.

"Bridgit's twin brother." He spat the words like they were venom on his tongue. "He never liked me. We knew each other when we were in middle school and I actually... punched his friend."

My jaw dropped. "You? You punched someone?"

"Bryson had just come out, and him and his friends were real homophobic fucks to him. So I threw one right at his cheek at lunch one day." He chuckled a little. "Mom and dad might have been really pissed about it, but Reece was actually really proud of me.

I let out a breath of a laugh. "Not surprised. He's a fighter himself, but in a protector sort of way."

Chris nodded. "He taught me that loyalty is the most important thing. And by choosing loyalty that day, I got an annoying enemy."

"He's the one bothering you?"

The firm set of his jaw was enough to confirm it. "He was so pissed when Bridgit and I started dating. The day he found out, he broke two of his mom's mason jars in the kitchen. He couldn't stand it. We tried avoiding going to her place when he was home or else he'd pick a fight and cause all this unnecessary drama. So you can imagine just how excited he was when we finally broke up. He'd hassle me in class, saying shit like I wasn't good enough for Bridgit or that he knew we weren't going to last. And even now he's still so damn annoying."