The Alphabet of Breaking Hearts

Simula

If you think it requires a heart to be beautiful, then think twice and try to meet me. However, I doubt you would ever have the slightest chance to do so because of my limited time for everyone but boys.

And this woman, just in front of me, is pitiful for wanting my attention so much.

Sitting alone in the cafeteria, kaharap ko ang dating nerd na naging self-proclaimed bitch para sa isang lalaking pinagpalit rin siya kinalaunan.

Pathetic simp.

"If looks could kill, my family can hire and pay the best doctor in the world to revive me. Heck, I would still live, baby girl," I calmly shot up while reaching my tea.

She closed her slightly opened mouth, trying to forget the fact she just dropped her own jaw while staring at my face. I guess looks can make someone out of their senses, too.

Clenching her fist, namumula-mula rin ang mukha niya sa galit. "Don't get me wrong, I don't fucking care if you live or die."

"I think..." I reached my fork at the table at sinimulan ang paghiwa sa fish fillet sa hapag. I made 3 slices at linasap ko 'yon nang buong puso bago nagpatuloy sa pagsasalita.

I'd call me an unbothered human.

"For anyone who has been insecure of me for being cheated on with a guy, I'd slightly appreciate your concern of my existence. Although, I'm not sure if you're glad by it."

I sipped the green tea by my side and saw from my peripheral view the countless pairs of eyes prying on us. I just wish some guy out there would admire my charm soon enough.

"You're even aware how Todd left me for you and you have the confidence to say that? Really?" her sarcastic laugh echoed all throughout the corners and I must admit, I could have been afraid.

She sounded like a villain but I was the protagonist of my own story. No way I'd feel threatened.

"And he left you because?"

Ibinaba ko ang tinidor na aking hinawakan at inabot ang tissue sa gilid para idampi sa aking bibig.

"H-hindi ko alam! Sigurado akong nilandi mo siya kasi maharot ka!"

I chuckled as a response.

"Todd, baby, can you come by my side?" saad ko nang malakas para marinig ng mga tao sa likuran ang nais kong maparating. I heard some shouts of his name to call his attention.

Nakita ko ang agad na pamumutla niya noong binanggit ko ang pangalan nito. Sunod ko namang narinig ang yapak ng isang taong papalapit.

"Patricia? What's this fuss about?" agad na bungad ni Todd.

"T-Todd, let me expla--"

"Baby, why do you love me?" I pouted and made my eye twinkle while looking at him.

Narinig ko ang pagsinghal ni Patricia at ang tugon ng lalaking nasa harap ko. "Because you are pretty and challenging..."

"Isn't she pretty, too?" I eyed her ex-best friend.

"Y-y-es."

"Isn't she challenging?"

Habang nakapamulsa ang kamay, mahina siyang umiling.

"I don't think so."

I acted like I was taken aback by what he said and emotionally made face. "But why?"

"There's no challenge in being good at almost everything. I want someone who's born with spice in themselves and very... unpredictable. She's boring, you know. I hate good girls."

Mahina siyang tumawa at nakita ko ang pamumuo ng luha ni Patricia.

I wickedly smiled and cupped him in the face, "You'd chase me if I leave, call me if we get into bad terms, kiss when we're drunk, and continue to admire me for being the unpredictable that I am, right?" bulong ko sa kaniya na narinig ng lahat at mahina itong tumango bilang sagot.

Noong malapit na magdikit ang mga labi namin, agad akong bumanat.

"Then let's break up."

Mabilis kong nilinis ang kalat ko at kinuha na ang bag sa gilid. Unti-unti kong napagtanto ang oras na nasayang ko sa dalawang taong 'to.

He was stunned by my words that he was not able to register it right away. I had a few steps from him before he shouted.

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I'm breaking up with you, stupid."

Nasilayan ko ang gulat sa mukha ni Patricia at nanatili akong hindi interesado sa buhay niyaa.

"And why the fuck would you do that?"

I smiled.

"Because you are predictable. I hate guys that are too easy to read, Todd. There's no spice within them."

I finally turned my back at them and shouted from a distance.

"And I'm not doing this for you, girl. I just love myself so much that I wouldn't let me be caressed by self-centered guys."

Agad akong nagmadali na makapunta sa CR habang naglalakad. Not that running is a low-class doing, but I just can't do it.

Narinig ko pa ang mga bulungan ng mga taong nakasalubong ko kung paano kadali para sa akin na harap-harapang iwan si Todd.

"Isipin mo 'yon, isang buwan niligawan. Tapos magtatagal lang kayo ng dalawang araw. Pucha!" hagikhik ng mga gusgusing lalaki sa gilid.

"Bilib talaga ako sa amats ng babaeng 'yan, buti di pa siya kinarma."

Tumango naman bilang pagsang-ayon ang isa niyang kasama. "Wala talagang puso,"

Agad kong pinihit ang door knob papasok sa CR. Ni-lock ito, at sinimulan ng halughugin ang dala-dala kong bag.

"Hinga, breathe. Don't stress yourself with what happened earlier," kausap ko sa sarili ko sa salamin.

I unbuttoned my uniform and slowly checked the machine connected to my abdomen. To see if things were going unusual. Luckily, the blood was still pumping on the average level but my heartbeat was fast.

"Wala kang puso..." I was taken aback by the voice behind me but I maintained my calm expression.

"Yes, and shut up."

I didn't mean it figuratively, but both of it in literal.

Agad kong tinitigan ang repleksyon niya sa salamin at nakita ang agad na pamumutla nito. Why does she have to be here, anyway?

"What is your name?" seryoso kong saad.

She blinked twice. "E-eloisa Anielle."

"A not so nice way of meeting you, Eloisa. Interested in sticking with me and keep your mouth shut?"

"H-ha?"

"I'll pay you."

"How much?" I smirked at her answer.

"Have yourself signed up for a school transfer this afternoon. We are both leaving this premise without letting anyone aware of what you accidentally learned."

She remained silent. Ugh, did she just got tongue-tied?

"I'll take that as a yes."

When will I ever get the chance to stop transferring school every time someone learns about my condition?

I guess this was one of the slightest bit of perks to dwell with an artificial heart. At the very least, I got to have my very own best friend.