Invaded by you (Ed Sheeran)

Chapter 5

8th January 2014

I miss you.

Today we’ve been hanging out all together at the beach, but you weren’t there. I’ve remember that summer when we travelled to Italy and you bought three jars of sun cream because I’m so pale and you were afraid that I could get sunburns and at the end all my face was completely sunburned because we both forgot about that part. You couldn’t stop laughing. I miss that laugh. And how you giggled every time I said something funny. I miss when you asked me if I could tie a knot of your bikini and sometimes we ended up making out.
 I can’t walk through London’s streets without thinking of you. You are always in my mind. It is so painful because I remember everything and I would sell my soul to the devil to go back at those times and do things in the right way. What can I do to make you want to stay by my side?

Ed.

**

Every Sunday after having lunch with his family, Ed and I took the car and drive to the outskirts of London. This time we decided to go to Southend-on-Sea, one hour away from London. He was wearing his green hoodie and his sunglasses. It wasn’t a warm day but Ed and I really loved to walk barefoot on the beach, he grabbing my hand, talking about silly things.

Then we walked all along the pier, it was incredible long. I remember the conversation we had that moment, when we were both looking at the infinite, where the sea seems to join the sky. He locked my waist between his arms and let his chin resting on my shoulder.

‘This feels so good’ he said softly against my ear. ‘I mean…being with you, feeling like there’s always someone there to take care of and...at the same time that person cares take of you.’

I smiled and added ‘Yes, you’re right and I love taking care of you. I could never imagine that we were to end up being together, even living together…if three years ago someone would had tell me “You are going to live with this guy” I would just probably laughed at his-her face. Who would tell me that one of my favourite things would be to waking up next to you.’

‘And now…look at us. Destiny is right now my favourite thing in the world’

‘Hey…but I thought it was me!’ I turned around to see his face and took off his glasses to wear them.

‘Well…let me fix it: You are my destiny and it feels incredibly amazing to think that you are going to be a part of my future.’

**

And now this is the future and it hurts. The worst thing of it is that nobody can tell you what’s going to happen, and when it happens you are not ready. It is almost impossible for me not to think about all the moments we’ve spent together. He is my everything. Well…he was. Right now I don’t have an ’everything’. At least not in love.

Today it’s Saturday and it’s my birthday. Is the first birthday in about 8 years that I’m spending it alone. It is 7am and I’ve been woke up by my son, jumping on my bed and singing ‘Happy Birthday’. Also, Imogen and John are coming to have breakfast together and then I am meeting Candice to go out for lunch.

‘Happy Birthday, dear Karlie.’ John gives me a hug and then talks again. ‘How does it feels to be 30? I wish I could be that age right now.

‘Don’t worry, John. You look absolutely like you were 29.’

‘Are you going out tonight to celebrate it?’ Imogen asks me this time.

‘Hm…I was thinking about it but I have to take care of the little monster.’

‘Then Acker is going to stay the night with granny and grandpa. I am sure he loves it as much as we do. And you are going to have fun with the girls.’

‘Thank you so much…you know, this means a lot.’

Imogen helps me with preparing the breakfast and setting the table. I’ve decided to have an English breakfast with eggs, sausages, bacon, since I’m really craving for it. After that, John brings out of the fridge a tiny cake. I put Acker on my lap to help me to the candles while Imogen takes a picture. I thanks them for bringing Acker with them, so I can spend a day off with Candice and some other girls at night.

Just 10 minutes after they left, someone knocks at my door.

‘Karlie Sheeran?’ the unknown man is holding a big bouquet of flowers and after I nod, he gives me the flowers and seconds later I sign a paper to agree that I’ve become the flowers.

I observe the White lilies and realize that there’s a note in an envelope. Before I start Reading it, I already know who sent me the flowers because of the handwriting.

‘Because this will never change. 30 white lilies for your 30 years. I hope you have an amazing time. I miss you. Ed’

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