chapter 4

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"Baby please li-"
"Don't call me baby. I fucking love you. Fuck off, we can talk once you decide not to act like a stupid asshole and decide not to leave me right after all this shit. Until then, fuck you."
"Lex please, just, can we talk when we are back our home?"
"You think your home? Cause it obviously isn't mine no more. Probably never even was."
"Lex, don't talk like that, you know that I love you so much, but that's for your sake. I can't get you more broken, I have to leave."
"No! Only thing you need to do in the life is die. And others are just what you want to do. And with leaving me you'll just get me 'more broken'."
"Lex please, just go back to sleep, this is not place to have a conversation like this."
He whispered, he didn't want everybody hearing how he is going to break her more than she already is.
"Do not tell me what to do and do not fucking touch me. Just fuck off already. Is it that big of a problem to say that you simply just don't love me and that you wanna break everything we built in last few months? Just say it already and leave me alone, cause it's not like you are planning on doing something else."
He looked at broken girl, he was broken too. That's the last thing he wanted to do, but he knew that that's for 'the best'.
He sat back were he was sitting earlier as Josh and Bryce looked between them.
"She isn't wrong."
Josh whispered.
"I fucking know! But would you stay with Nessa if something like that happened to her? Knowing that you cause even more issues to her if you stay with her?"
Josh just stayed silent, he'd do the exact same thing, but watching others do it, you can see how hard it actually is.
"See? That's what I thought."

Once they landed and got back home, Lexi became more anxious. She was ashamed, it was already enough that Jaden saw exactly what happened and then everyone in the plane.
She felt like she was worthless and that everyone would see her as a disgusting hoe.
They walked in the house and everyone jumped up, embracing them into hugs. Almost everyone was crying.
"Baby what happend? Did they do something bad to you?"
Lexi's mom asked as everyone looked at them, waiting to hear what happened.
"I-uh, n-no. He just, um, held us locked in rooms, um, playing mind games or something."
She muttered as everyone nodded. Jaden and her knew it was a lie. Along with Nessa, Bryce, Josh, Blake, Vinnie and Griffin. But they understood why she didn't want to say the truth to some point.
"I, uh, um, I wanna be alone."
She whispered, slowly walking up stairs going in the bathroom.
Once she was in, she locked the doors sliding down on the floor and she broke down crying. She didn't knew which part more hurts. That she was raped, that her boyfriend watched it, that she feels like a worthless piece of shit, that she had to lie to everyone, that even too many people know she was touched or that her boyfriend she is deeply in love with planned on leaving her. Her body was shaking, at the even thought of what happened there. She took her clothes off, crawling down in the shower as the water hit her body, making her gasp.
She felt like she wanted to die, it hurts too much.
She firstly wanted to wash her self, but instead of that, she got out of shower walking to toilet to throw up.
Then once again, sobbing, sat down in shower grabbing shampoo to wash her dirty hair.
She washed her whole body five times, every single inch of it. And then, using a razor she cut few lines on her wrist. She just wanted to leave. Her sobs became more quiet as she started feeling dizzy.

There was three loud bangs on the bathroom doors, making her jump up.
"Lexi are you okay?!"
Jaden's voice echoed inside of the bathroom.
"Like you care."
She said sniffling.
"Don't talk like that Lexi, you know I'd give my life for you."
"Yeah yeah, with same energy you want to leave me."
"Just come out, I want to talk."
"No."
"Why?"
She just stayed silent.
"Lexi if you don't open the doors for me I'm gonna break them down."
"Leave me alone!"
She sobbed now getting scared again.
"I'm sorry princess, please just open the doors for me."
She wrapped towel around herself walking out the bathroom, pushing past Jaden.
She locked the doors of closet, getting clean clothes on.
She again walked in bathroom to dry her hair.
"Lex please,"
"Don't beg me now Jaden, we have nothing to talk about, I'm leaving like you wanted me to."
"Just, c'mon, this doesn't have to end like this. Why can't we just talk like normal people?"
"What? Am I supposed to now 'talk it out', and with that you mean just to tell me 'hey, fuck you, I don't wanna be with you anymore, just cause I'm a dickhead and get scared when somebody actually wants to love me so I hurt them and push them away'? I'm not gonna listen to that!"
"You know that I love you, and I'll do for the rest of my life. But it's not right if I stay with you, knowing that I caused the shit that happened and that I'll probably cause even more."
"So you think now that you break up with me and push me away will help? It's not like my family isn't doing same job like you do."
"The last thing I wanna do is to break up with you and hurt you. Please don't do it on harder way, please."
"I don't get you right now! You are begging me to not do it on harder way when you are the one that want me to leave. And if you think that leaving me, after all we've been through together, will make the situation better and that will make me feel better and feel more safe and less like a worthless piece of shit, sorry to break it to you, but it won't! It will just cause more damage. And you know what hurt more? That you told it to Bryce first and not to me. That fucking hurts!"
She was now sobbing, tears streaming down her face uncontrollably.
"And now you're just gonna stay silent? Yeah, really nice."
She grabbed my phone getting out her card and grabbed her wallet.
"I'm taking Marley, I don't care."
Jaden just stayed silent, he knew he had to let her go. Even if that hurts so bad, both of them.
She took one last look at him and nodded bitting her lip. She was so mad. After everything he is just going to break her. And not that he is going to break her, he doesn't even have courage to say anything.
"Goodbye Jaden."
"G-"
Before he even could say his last goodbye, she was out of room.
Everyone was still downstairs, they heard most of their argument. And they all knew what was happening cause Bryce said what Jaden told him. But he only left out part where she was raped.
"I, uh, sorry for that. Um, I, Coop, can you come here for a second?"
Her parents immediately ran behind her, they knew she was really hurt and that she couldn't be alone by herself.
"Ale!"
"What?"
She looked at her parents crying, Marley in her hands, he now pretty big.
"Come here."
Her mom engulfed her in the hug as her dad rubbed her back, Josie and Nick running out the house to them.
"We are going home together, c'mon."
"No, I don't want to. Coop, can you please drive me to my house?"
"Ale don't do that, where are you going?"
"In house in Malibu. Don't try coming there, I don't wanna see anybody. I need time for myself."
"Ale, you've been through trauma, you can't be alone. We are going home and we'll be there for you. C'mon."
"No! I told you. I'm going to Malibu, I don't want people around me. And don't try coming there, if you wanna help me just don't come."
They all hugged her and she sat in car with Cooper.

"Lex."
Cooper said breaking the silence after 30 minutes of their ride.
"Yeah?"
She mumbled sniffling. She was crying whole time.
"Do you want to talk to me? What happened there? I won't tell anybody, I promise."
She shook her head no, and he nodded. He wouldn't press her, but he did want to know what happened, cause it obviously was something bad.
"You wanna talk about you and Jaden?"
"H-How could h-he l-leave me? H-He was the o-one talking how he-he will marry me. H-He was the one w-who said he-s in love with me. He can't ju-just say 'oh, yeah, a l-lot of shit happened and n-now I'll leave, cause if i st-ay I'm causing her p-pain and putting her in d-danger'. No. Leaving me causes more p-pain. Yeah, this past few month-s were a m-mess, but th-they are the best ones in my l-life. He h-helped me w-with everything. I-I never loved some-one like I lo-love him."
"I know Lexi, and I can guarantee you hundred percent he feels the same. He was never happy like he is with you. And he was never that protective over a girl."
"Then w-wh-"
"Sometimes, Lexi, we have to let people we love go. Maybe- maybe this is better for you guys."
"How can it be better?!"
Girl was still sobbing, Cooper's words really hit something deep down inside of her. Thought of not spending her life with him really hurt her.

°°°°°°°°°°

This is me crying again✋🏻
Y'all have been begging, I just had to make everything up, so there ya go!
Do you think they'll get back together, or they'll never see each other again and find somebody new?
words count: 1731

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