The sight the mirror offers me is horrifying. My eyes look like they've been stung by a bee, which they actually have been - not by a bee, of course.
Lisa's been trying to calm me down, yet this heaviness in my heart isn't easing anything. This burden on my shoulder is just getting heavy each passing minute. It's been almost a week, I guess, and I've not been in contact with anyone other than Lisa.
My own blood turned cold on me by a woman who just knew how to play well. And I've been a victim of my own heart.
His intoxicating presence, be it a temporary lie, made me feel all the things, I could never.
But the truth, I kept pushing aside was,
he never loved me and
I always did...
I thought unrequited love could not hurt anymore, but it's rare in my fate that I end up being right.
His smiles and failed attempts at flirting were my guilty pleasures. I could feel connected in little moments of us, but the only thing he ever connected was our lips. His cherry lip balm tasted sweeter than my own favorite tint. His aura alone had a strong effect on me and he knew it, he knew it all too well. But I knew too, this wasn't for me, 'He' wasn't for me. My sin being love, brought me here today, where my own reflection could tell a tragedy did occur.
aah
how beautiful, I thought it was to be in love
be it one sided
at least I have all control
but only if I knew...
Now, all what lies in my plate are broken relationships and pieces of trust with a pungent smell of betrayal lingering around.
"For God's sake Y/n!! Stop it!"
Lisa's shrill voice brings me back to the present, I am barely living in.
I look at her almost not paying attention yet again.
"Stop playing with the food, I'm not letting you get up from here until I see this plate empty. You can't only keep having chocolates and ice-cream! It's been enough time."
"Lisa, please-"
"No, Y/n! You're being such a crying mess here, acting like a walking zombie and the people who did this to you are just living their lives like nothing happened."
"And what can I do about it?"
I dryly, let out short responses.
She scoffs, anger evident in her tone,
"Act, Y/n! Get up and fight, not that you're actually a liar! I thought you had some brains but guess this Jungkook took 'em well huh?"
"Yah!"
"Why? It hurts? It should. Let it hurt, Y/n. Take it, embrace it, it's okay, I'm not angry at you for this. But Y/n there should be something, some little thing you might be missing out now, that can expose them both! Think Y/n, after you show your middle finger to those b*ches, we can even arrange a crying party, if you want!"
Silence engulfs us for minutes, as I take in her words slowly. Telling my brain to think of anything but grief right now.
"Lisa... they just played me too well... and I-I couldn't help but-but justt just keep fall-falling for hhim..."
As these words fall out of my mouth, a tear does too, following behind more of them.
I feel Lisa's arms around me, rubbing the small of my back,
"It's okay, Y/n-ie, it wasn't your fault. It's not wrong to be in love and you did nothing wrong. We can talk about this later but please eat something, he isn't worth it, no one is, no one should be worth the cost of your own heath."
