Everything We Ever Wanted [Everything #1]

EWEW 7: The Ugly Monster Inside Of Me

My mom was home so I didn't have to worry about Michael being alone. Soon after, I quickly made my way to Marnie's Shack, the place renowned for having the best burgers in town.

Layla was seated at a booth by the window, her head hung low as she typed away on her phone. She hadn't spotted my car in the parking lot yet. Nor had she looked up from her phone when I entered the retro-themed bar-restaurant, the bell chiming above the entrance door catching everyone's attention but hers. 

A friendly waiter behind the counter gave me a wink and I smiled politely, before heading towards Layla.

I sat down and her head snapped up in surprise, recognition dawning upon her features. A sheepish grin curved her mouth.

"Hi." Her voice was low, far from the upbeat tone I was used, too. She actually looked tired as hell.

"Hey."

The silence between us was unbearable until the same waiter from earlier trudged over, presented himself as Bennett, and took our milkshake orders.

"I'm sorry," she blurted out the second he was out of earshot distance, breaking the ice.

My eyebrows hitched up. I had two options: make light of what she told me three nights ago, or give her a hard time redeeming herself. I went with the latter. "What part?"

She ran her hand over her pale face. "Everything. Bringing up Joey Donald, Samuel Adams and the fact that... you're a cold hearted bitch who doesn't give anyone a chance."

I fiddled with the straw of my mango-banana milkshake, before speaking really quietly. "You were right." And I was woman enough to acknowledge the fact. 

Her eyebrows reciprocated my earlier moves and she asked, "What part?"

A wry smile touched my lips. "Everything. About Joey Donald - " It was still hard to talk about him. "- Samuel Adams, and the fact that I'm a cold hearted bitch who doesn't give anyone a chance."

There was no one in the dinner, save for us and an old man reading the daily newspaper by a pink and yellow bar stool. Clatters of plates and utensils echoed in the place. No words were exchanged between Layla and I for a couple more minutes as we continued to sip our respective drinks. Our quiet breathing did the talking for awhile.

"Fuck, Anna." She let out a whistling, defeated breath. "I'm so sorry." 

And I knew she was. Layla'd given me the dose of harsh reality that I was lacking. But I wasn't completely damaged goods, I had to remind myself. That night at Joshua Brown's party, I'd spoken to that cute guy Troy. It was a small, safe attraction I hadn't felt in a very long time, reminding me that I wasn't exactly emotionally unattached.

Just to guys who brought out my flirty, rebellious and reckless side. I wanted to - needed to - stay away from them.

"I know you are, Layla," I sighed, giving in and letting her off easy. "And I was closed off. After him and my dad... things shifted inside of me and my priorities changed. I'm a different girl than the seven year old you and Gabby became friends with. And I'm also a different girl than the sixteen year old you and Gabby used to drink and party with."

"It's true," Layla whispered with a sad look and her voice took on a far-away tone.

"And I definitely will never commit the mistakes that sixteen year old Anna committed." I held her gaze, conveying with my eyes what words couldn't. "But I'm still me, Layla. No matter how much I've changed."

And that meant kicking to the curb my unholy attraction to Samuel freakin' Adams, because he reminded me too much of my initial mess to begin with.